FArG Q

2007-04-02T02:53:00.000+08:00

the very familiar plain settings of the posting window that i am now typing on.
it brings back lotsa memories. it's true. how i lament and complain, joke and feeling disdain.
it's like talkin to an old friend again.

lets see uh
i think i missed out on lotsa events here.
but so what.it's just as well.
it kinda makes me less analytical about stuffs that are happening
i dun have to stop and look back.i'll be more on the ball this way.

which kinda concludes this whole entry. not that it's an essay of an entry anws hahaha
dayum.i see no purpose already.
should i go on wooooooooooooo

maybe someone should make a blog for the hoods.
who happy feel like blogging the blog there uh.
it's much more interactive that way.
i think im passed the stage of diary kinda thingy.
that's it i think! the reason why i read ppl's blog!
a peek into their diary! that's why i was a pest!
i always feel the thrill to read my sister's diary last time..hahah

and that scrapbook idea that chewy mentioned.that'll be neat.

thanks for still visitin the blog sia guys
so sweet.hahah

2007-01-14T14:42:00.000+08:00

ok ok.
new day.
new dawn.
new year.
new lungs.
new bunks, trunks and skunks.

im so needed that alex is coming all the way here just to learn the mutu maji.

so wheres my laksa.

supergrass..please give me the power to survive this term.
thanks i s magazine.

2006-12-26T00:31:00.000+08:00

it's been a year already.
365 days.

miss u mom.

2006-12-20T01:34:00.000+08:00

i'll let u guys in on a lil screamer.

my dad said if this rain is gonna continue for 3 more days( tt'll be 5 days straight) then
something bad is gonna happen.

personally i feel quite blessed that we're greeting the holidays with such a weather
lavished with comfy beds and pillows and blankeys in our nice little room in our nice little comfy clothes....then when u think of the homeless and the poor..oh man.

so next time please donate and do charity and pray there'll be lesser poverty and frugal people.
=)

i freakin loss the old chatterbox and there, the new one...damn.

those with slippers please walk carefully..slippery
and this is a good time to use all those winter clothes that we keep deep in the closet yo
and dun step on the snails ok

lalalala

2006-12-05T02:35:00.000+08:00

greetings.

yea, i dont think i'll feel the same way about this whole damn thing
if it wont be from the back up i get from the hoods.
such unconditional loving. yikes.

i thought yonglian was really cool when he talked abt those things.

anws i think im still cutting my hair. i dun wanna bug wang pheck hoon
she said the directors will chase her etc. since i like her i'll do as she says..

okay..it's so not cool that elijah lost my walkman cover la..
the whole thing feels naked now

milton please be ok soon.

we need more new tunes eh

it's fun to play with vannessa hahah sounds wrong

oh and chalet's coming, awesome! hope i will have enuff money till then

oh..and then there's the chicken rice im buying yangxu jiuyuan and van

i feel like lookin at the kaleidascope now
nice right chewy=)

so..........
what's life like now eh?..

i just feel like
im in a washing mashine
tumbling up and down my nice comfy clothes
still dun see the direction yet
yet to touch earth still.. abt school la.

feel so cliche
schs and exams
the teachers are damn cool though..kenneth sheh
tsk, i lost that sense of learning experience
lucky i have some really nice classmates though, yea

maybe i have to stop comin home late everytime?
brain says i should do something abt final exams
it's like damn scary

i still wanna go to the zoo and beach and watch movie though
disposable income..haha..

anyways..
how are youdoing

2006-11-20T00:25:00.000+08:00

i wake up
it's a bad dream
no one on my side
i was fighting
but i just feel too tired to be fighting
guess im not the fighting typeee

2006-11-11T01:09:00.000+08:00

1.03am
fast one.

first time.meddle with christmas tree.fun cip.damn tiring.cute kids.sad coz they say "dun lie ure not coming back".alot of mei mei play 1 2 3 jump! with me as if i got metal back.i kena called molester.diaozing ceremony.then damn nice friends.van jiuyuan yangxu went back to take hp with me.careless i was(standard..sorry mak)yangxu was like damn sweating and he still ran back with me.like sprint.but for fun.damn rock and roll.he even lend me ezlink.so, treat dinner one fine day.pow gig.love the hoodlums.crowd=thehoodlums.the cramp in my back and leg seem to dissipate ba.damncool.thank you everyone, u guys are the best.damn hungry havent had dinner.1 week plus nv eat at home.serious.tonight came home to eat, coz theres always food at night but i end sleeping coz too tired,then today so chun no food in the kitchen.maggie is nice.chicken flavour.
tmr milton match must watch.8am at dover.then chill a bit at sentosa.then MUST STUDY.NEXT WEEK EXAM PLEASE.ok.goodnight.

no we never talk

2006-11-08T22:41:00.000+08:00

sitting and staring at the blank
do not come home late for you have just lost your wife do not lose your daughters and sons
extend you arm to the ones u want love, do not push in the name of love
do not think too far, do not think of not thinking too far

wishing for a pill, would be nice to make me forget
for going away so long, tearing alone sometimes cannot be fun
having no money, feeling rich as ever with friends, who needs money
do no belittle money for it will belittle you

promise once.
promise once.

have fun..but the work..remember to get it done.
a new house you have. may it be your sweet humble abode.
so tell me, if i dun do anything and just sit and sigh
will anyone come?
if anyone should come, should i feel good about myself
isnt that being narrowminded
if so then why do the mind keep thinking of attention
keep thinkin of companion
keep thinkin of the perished home..

we dun feel home anymore.
i dun want to close the eyes and try to think of home.
cause when i open them, it's still just the box.

it's okay if u dun feel right.
i'd rather make u feel alright and remain here in my plight.

i do not say the things i mean
im bad at doing what i preach
i preach what other should do

i do respect you
but tell me, do you really think i do?

ok so the world will keep spinning
but dun u think i need someone to scold me
i dun think i will let just anyone scold me
scolding is good for the heart.

if u didnt scold me, i wouldnt have grown to understand fear.
fear is nothing without you.
but now without you, i fear you're still watching.
because of your scolding, i still fear, fear.

now that they want us.
there's something that is of certain value what we are doing
wasting money and time to trash the crash
wasting time and money to burn friendship and sticks
creating buzz from fruit shop
creating money from writing in notebooks

fitting in angry lines and and fake agendas
lookin cool and feeling high
just seem to cut it for this messed up spirit

you dun even know what youre writing
it's just a space
a space where ppl come and see
and think, and deduce and evaluate
they will then have things to say

what if i dunno what i feel yet.
think emotionally.
what if i dunno what i want yet.
think realistically.
what if there's no reason to do things anymore.

but that's not right is it?
without the wrong, it's sometimes hard to see the right.
why did you even bother being right.
but isnt being wrong something right too.

needs are,
spa.
time.
decide on something.
real people like irving
more sun and sand and sea
take me to the other side.
no more secrets.
give all the shows you can give.

i think of you everytime mom.

2006-10-31T22:41:00.000+08:00

ownnnageeeeeeee

absentism.
that's the name of the game as of late.
but hey. it is only from absentism, that you know the meaning of presence.

so ive been like absent from school for that whole week
it was the raya week
and haha never get MC. (ownded)
hahaha

ok.
thus far we got ourselves some neat schedule=)
this friday sp audition
sunday gashaus
friday pow
yea.

talkin bout raya. i seriously have nothing to talk about. not to mention the really pathetic
total collection ( $14 ) diaozzing ceremony..

and.
i havent seek forgiveness from my brothers and sisters..
it just isnt the same with you mom~

--------

oh well
heaps of assignments awaiting.
like so long never touch tutorials.
ppl in class look haggard as days pass.
it's like those faces u see in labour intensive factories..sad.

oh man.just now went jammin with jiuyuan,zhengjie,yangxu,yonglian.
damn screwed uh. hahahahaahah
but i think it was a smarter choice compared to sitting thru stats lecture
not that i have anything against ken kwan..hehehe he got good fashion sense ba.

i need drum key.
drum sling bag.
what else uh.

okay..

have a nice day humanoids~

2006-10-26T19:56:00.000+08:00

dioazing ceremony.

today is THursday and it's the third of my ponteng this week.
how do i feel?
sucks uh. i can imagine the workloads sia. the lectures that i missed out
some 5% test. tutorials i havent touched. "so looking forward" to weekends..
ya. sick la. really..haha

damn.

now feel like skippin tmr also.
and im not really feelin that fine anws.
next week confirm go=D

next gig 5 nov ok?
okay.

2006-10-26T12:47:00.000+08:00

to all that have supported and cheered for us. tsk tsk..

cant be thanked enough.
=)))

i guess we'll keep playing and be better as a form of gratitude to you guys~

what a night~

2006-10-23T02:44:00.000+08:00

hello.

ive learnt aplenty about transexuality today.
and i think it's like, sad.
it's like one of life's tragedies. but that's life.

as short as possible,
transexuality is in fact a birth defect.
ure born into a body which is opp of ur sex. ( girl brain, boy body )
and it happens.
so it;s not like they wanna be gay or lesbians.
they hormonal imbalance naturally made them do the things they do.

so they grow up in a body opposite of their sex.
imagine u cant explain why u just cant mix with the guys and you would rather
sit with girls and play with dolls.
or say to hell with nails lets cut my pony tail and play some soccer.
and sometimes it's really very mentally AND physically tormenting ( the ah gua kena beat up )

so uh.
i went to this site la ( it's a CD project for monday, but im not gg to sch, im sick -.- )

read the poems and read the comic strip.
it's quite something.
better not be haste in saying the wrong things abt ppl now..~

I've always wanted to be female

and give my identity for sale.

I've never felt like a boy -

playing with dolls instead of army toys.

I've searched for explanations the whole day,

just dreaming and not listening to what my parents wanted to say.

I've worn the clothes of my sister and my mother,

but they've never seen the pain from which I suffered.

Just being the first day at school,

there were others who made the rules.

As I entered the class: all eyes on my.

Didn't believe what they've obviously seen:

I've just worn what I always wore,

but I already heard their laughter standing in front of the door.

WIthout any make-up - my mother's idea.

Just going into the class with kind of fear.

2006-10-20T00:09:00.000+08:00

"alamat!!"

he keeps saying ALAMAT when i still tell him it's ALAMAK not ALAMAT..hahah!

2006-10-19T04:07:00.000+08:00

i still can put it my head that my friend has just passed away.
he's 18.

he's always been nice to me.
i only remember him gettin angry once.

you're in the land of the free now.
this is space is for you man
rest in peace Bryson.

treasure your friends guys.

2006-10-15T10:16:00.000+08:00

ok .
so my bro and i are gonna leave for lim chu kang like we always would on sundays,
well this sunday at least.
like the last 2 weeks i didnt go-.-

i think it was the gashaus.

so before i got early today
i had a dream.
i was walkin to sp. and i took a short cut.
first i passed this void deck
but i think it had stereos on the ceiliing
coz i heard power 98
and then they were playing lumberjack
then aft playin the dj said
"that was the nerves and they're on a roll here" or something like tt
then i think i was late for school
coz i stopped to listen to how we sound on the radio
ironically there wasnt ppl around
and..aft that i carry on walkin to the shortcut
i cant really recall but it was thru like some jungle
and it was scary. looks like clarence lane with PSI 180 at dusk.

you've forgotten me forgotten you forgotten me forgotten you've forgotten me

2006-10-09T23:33:00.000+08:00

tee heee

i think my mind's now like in uh..like train mode like hyper articulated mode that kind.

tee hee

then i just felt like spitting it out everything here la
hahha

k wait
erm
when i jaywalked from the bus stop opp my house ( i think i nv use the bridge, yea even when it's raining )
i recalled that time when i was in gan eng seng uniform
then skali after i cross right
i walked towards my house there la
skali got one lady gestured me to come towards her
i thought what sia
skali she's a teacher from queenstown sec then i kena reprimanded sia
but short while oni uh
then she asked me i from what school
then i said queensway...hahahahaha! woo!
i think aloy was with me uh hahaha
i think she bought it, know why? coz our uniform same..outram also..diaozing ceremony-.-

hahah ok
i went ps with leopard just now
i think i spent too much. i think im over the budget liaoz.
must not spend anymore can annot uh... diaozing ceremony-.-
i bought like..a shirt for finals, carol's birthday gift, jet cd..sial uh
cannot spend anymore understand...but maybe need la for jamming;)

what else uh
i got this character development proj that i need to do uh with a grp
our topic is like...sex. it is sex uh walan.
then they want something NEW. learn something new.
sial uh..like the audience are like..us.. what DONT they know about sex right..
diaozing ceremony-.-
sumore need to make a game outtaf it sia related to topicccc
and the ironic part abt this is that, the teacher stipulated; no explicit contents
diaozing ceremony-.- ( everyone say diaozing~ diaozing~)
what fun is there about sex if you dont explicify it right
sianz ji pa puay, see if can ask for some leeway..

what else uh
friday got test i want get A
i just taught my bro maths sia..so uber weird can
he's like takin Os uh this year, i hope im a good enough help sia
it's so sick to relive the Os period again la..

i think he's gonna help me run my engine even more ( my brain )
coz he's gonna ask me qns then i'll be like recallin and stuffs
yea..v good for my goal for this semester
it's gonna condition my performance
so i can steer towards my achievement
hahahaha all that sounds so... diaozy hahaha

jet album no lyrics
diaozing ceremony...

okay..
i have to find a good reason to strike a conversation with thee
need a good timing.. damn.

a few more days to macdogol ( 20/10. 11pm - 1am, lido )
a few more days to zoo ( 25/10. 6pm, zouk.need tickets eh..)
fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

so fun v long never blog hahaha.. D C!

2006-10-09T10:12:00.000+08:00

hello=)

she gets pete and not tad hamilton woo!
u know when it's true it's true~

2006-10-02T22:30:00.000+08:00

...ha.. what ive been doing..

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2101268298

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2101224716

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2006-09-21T01:13:00.000+08:00

hey guys =)

what's new?
well, coupla' things.
im keepin it short though.

do support us k? The Nerves =)
http://www.power98.com.sg/pages/power_jam.php
we're in semis. then uh..it's free! just let us see ur faces and
we'll have some fun! =))
I THINK it's 30th sept 2 pm, organisers not so efficient, till now no email-.-

a little gig.Music Mania.
www.gashaus.com
1st oct, 2pm - till late.
*$10, uh..inclusive of free soft drink. haha
it's like so ex, and i hate the smell of the place.
till now we dunno what time is our half hour slot-.-

oh i am an islander now~
ooooh yeeeah~ oooh yeaaah yeeah yeaah~
yeeeaaah iyeeah~
a shame a whole full month will be taken by the fasting month
haha!

my sis cooks the best hokkien mee!!
im so very proud of her
i wish my wife can cook hokkien mee for me...oh wife~

sch's gonna start=)
and so will Ramadhan.

2006-09-06T10:54:00.000+08:00

mambo loves jumbo
the toes loves the sand
we played joga bonito
and we got tanned

well.. yea
still havent find anything much to be busy with
just the usual domestic tasks though
sure it looks as if a whirlwind pass thru
the hall, the room AND the kitchen EVERYMORNING
but then again, without mr whirlwind,
i'd have even lesser things to do.

sianz.
just waiting for friday thenn..

saturday last day leyyyyyyyyyyy
quickkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

"aio, aio, aio"
=)

2006-09-01T19:06:00.000+08:00

like liking a hot spoon

what a bummer; was looking forward to it very much

what should i do

yknow tt helpless sittin in the well unanswered and unwanted kinda feeling
it sucks like a spoilt...fries..

who wants to eat fries with me?

i got qn number 2.

2006-08-29T11:47:00.000+08:00

Life. .. . .

..miss you mom~

2006-08-14T23:41:00.000+08:00

i cutted hair.
wishing for another bbq gathering where the people are merry and takin pic with humans such as naomi and elijah seems a necessity.
keepin mind focus for exam
"Sinar Asnah" the commence~ the humble beginnings would be a more fruitful one if anyone of you would wanna visit my family's stall. nasi lemak and bee hoon goreng=) power ok!
Lumberjack, session 2.
To KILL VERMIN AT SIGHT.
still dont know goals in life.
still missing mumsy.
hating the drift.
exam exam exam
feet still not on the ground..

future! future! think of the future guys!
do now what's for later, and dont do later for what's now.

and for confusing you with that,
i find a cheap sense of accomplishment and feel a tinge of
esteem and a little better about life.

the humour..~

nah. dont want it to end like that.

i wanna live life. yea..~

2006-08-06T14:51:00.000+08:00

alrighty~

ladies and gents, pardon my absence.
i have been facing a lack of time and the enthu to blog like how i used to.
probably due to o;iadad[\ and some ohaspduspa9du that's been going on
during the time when i was off from blogging.

anws..
i have to say.
the play, KALEIDASCOPE was totally off the hook.
i mean..yea sure i know how the whole thing's gonna end.
but man was it great.
special mention; farah, vivvy, sheean and naomi.
u guys were ah ah ah awesome~

uh..poly..left 2 more papers. then uh..holiday? i think.
damn i think im on the verge on retaining uh.
dude...~

it sucks.

2006-07-06T22:56:00.000+08:00

how is it like to live like this?
im in the the roundabout of resonance.
i hear only echoes of myself.
i tried so hard to breakthrough,
but breakthough didnt even try to break me.
it's the point of aimlessness. it's the point of self righteousness, also.
i fear not unpredictability.i fear not uncertainty.
i only flinch at these times of your needed presence.
the reason im here is nearing bleak.
the fire is only rekindled still without a reason.
a new person.
she could be a reason.
still i have to make it on my own.
some pride in myself.
name of family i will never shelf.
im still breathing, heart still beating.
lay low my black spirit.
burn strong.
my power will tremble you.
live on.

2006-06-30T18:59:00.000+08:00

hello friends=)

how's it going? =)

hehehhee.. ghay.

2006-06-11T20:06:00.000+08:00

hey.

since no one's chattin with me now that im online i might as well be bloggin.
strange how ppl only wanna chat with me when my icon is left busy. trick..

i think fer this one, i wanna talk abt my pri sch friends..

hmm..i dunno howta start.
but right now i just feel that im gettin sick n tired of keepin
my pri sch friends together somehow.
i remember feeling so enthu abt organising outings with fellow mcps
but i think the situation is such that..
everyone is growing older and away from old friends.
how sad is that?
i dunno.... what can i say.. everyone is really busy with their newfound life.
not that it's a bad thing. but it's kinda sad in a way.
or am i just too loyal for nothing.
i really am smiling when i think of primary sch, and the people there.

do you all?

i have 2 primary sch PE shirt. and i told myself, i wanna frame them up
when im older and too big for the shirt. (yes i can still fit in them hahah!)
ha..abit dumb i know.
but i cant help put place sentimentality tops sometimes..
and i find it irritating at times. sigh.

allow me to whine.

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ah well.
it's not so bad.
i still got a few im close with! willy wonka. chewy panda just to mention some..
sabbiemomo, she's busy always=(
roZ
amir..

haaiya. no mood to think of these anymore la. sian.
i support holland, u all ley?

2006-06-11T19:24:00.000+08:00

greetings humanoids =)

hee

let's see..
it's abt half hour past twilight
and the sky's crimson red

the cements are wet and the grass are glossy green
and that song playing by carpenters is setting my heart agleam =)

There's A Kind Of Hush, it's called.

"the only sound that you will hear, is when i whisper in your ears i love you~"

oh man that's so.....sweet.
don't it make you wanna fall in love.. hehehe
it's that unfathomable feel oldies insinuates. it's one of a kind i tell ya.
esp in this cool and wet and dark night. makes me wanna
snuggle up with somebody really comfy.

aww man. this mood is overpowering.
i gotta go! hehehe..

it's a little gay buy hey! it's love! know what i mean? =)

2006-06-07T21:54:00.000+08:00

today's post was aroused by the phrase; u learn something new everyday.

tell me... is that true for u?
ask me..is that true for me?

what did u do today? did u break outtaf yer routine or perhaps break ur nail
and made new discoveries? like why apek keep their nails on the last finger really long?
why they wanna keep up there, in their nose, fer so long, in the public, rotating at very complex
motion, at every angle humanly possible, that even a flea's egg couldnt escape the carnage?

well... we are all amazed, bewildered by new discoveries. haa... the wonders of life..

2006-05-30T19:30:00.000+08:00

blog: oi..so long nv blog
syaq: oh..ya la..tired siak..
blog: trick..
syaq: yknow what..i still am, in holiday mood
blog: trick..
syaq: sial uh..really siak..erm..maybe not really la
blog: trick..
syaq: but uh..siak uh i think all my test all fail siak, i seriously didnt bother studying
blog: uh? power la..continue uh like that
syaq: ... thanks uh babe
blog: ya la..u must wake up sia..ur future is at stake. all A's for a place in the u rmbr?
syaq: sial uh..i nv aim untill so far siak..i this type of person..dun have the calibre la..
blog: trick..
syaq: really la..sial uh..my presentation tt time i kena tongue tied..cheap thrill bodoh~
blog: baikpunye technique..
syaq: sad sia. i felt so uhh...sumtin towards keith. coz he wanted it to be perfect sia. If i didn;t know better. i'd say he's a perfectionist.
but aiya..no la.. and damn it..i cant seem to find the right words to say these days..
i think it's my brain..
blog: trick..
syaq: aiya..i have to go collect money from office..n..the cheque thing..so tiring..
blog: woo! ching ching!
syaq: ya la..im so bored of money siak. haiz..
blog: you're in a 3 yr course stdying HOW TO MAKE MONEY!
syaq: trick..
blog: ahh..amek kau obat.
syaq: uh huh..
blog: uh huh kepale otak kau berjambul.
syaq: sial uh. i read keith's blog. and it's bursting with loneliness la. he so sad siak that boy. mm..he was talkin abt how ppl are gonna forget his birthday again. im gonna buy him something la. later. tired siak. k la. i dun wanan talk to u anymore.
i miss my mom.
blog: trick..

blog: ooh..feisty.

2006-05-19T19:29:00.000+08:00

today's friday. im with the hoodloms once again.
we just lack the few others kachuaks
it's still chillin we are

and thanks to technological advancement
the birth of the laptop
has given the possibility of bloggin in mobile~

i am physically exhausted.
mentally right now, i cant wait for the movie later.
i hope my..eye..they can be kept open. tralala

daily occupation as an sp student
has been rather pleasent i must say
being the clown and social moth
has its glam
ahaaaaaaa...yea...

so amusing to hear keith laugh
free food from yvonne
ride to sch with maisie
constant jieeeee jiee chants
tralala with tiff *)

tests and presentations are bottle neckin though
and it's makin me look like a lazy...lampost.
and some really imcompetant........bible.
yea.

yea..

i want cable car now..
:(
R

2006-05-07T15:55:00.000+08:00

hello humanoids

i dun wanna apologise for not bloggin
coz i dun feel sorry
i dun feel apologetic
why? not happy uh?
go smoke weed uh

ya la.

so yea.
farah made my blog sounds so important
so here i am doing the least to not waste her breath
hmmmmmmmmmmm

yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i feelin liek cycling to tiong
i want my large fries chewy
when the hell u gettin ur pay siak

i cant wait la ..
i smsed elijah to go there with me
then he said he's at marsiling
why am i typing all these?
it's so boring
like when im old then i read back
oh.. okay la
quite interesting. ok.

ya..
so im now chattin with carissa also
im askin her to join us next friday
haha
will be fun to be in tt awkward moment
she'll be all paiseh n stuff
cheap thrill dokkk

aiya..
so many hmwrk la my course
chau chin chau..

k k
im listening to the cd devina gave me before leaving to
australia
hahaha im listening to it only now siak
ok uh..nice sophomore indo songs

hiaz
this is still boring la
but hey farah will read this piece of wasted
internet space

hey it's a gd thing to have a fan
i mean..
micheal jackson can keep on being a fag
n ppl will still love him
like me! hahaha
i love mj la.

yea.
so who wanna be our bassist?

im using nokia 3310
power punye phone..
power skodok
skojel skopong skongel

oh man my dad's eldest bro
just hand in an invitation letter to me
tts..kinda weird..ok
wedding invitation.
ha..someone's gettin married again.
so tiring.
so tiring.

--> to marry. u need money.
need money? work. need work? need to school clever clever.
need school? more money
then when u marry need more money for babies house etc.

wow i cant wait to get married.
not.

hmm..what else..

ya la.. i want fries..im hungry la
oh yea..but this morning i was craving for pizza.
hmm..

just gimme my fries la

2006-04-25T09:34:00.000+08:00

hey guysss! haha..forgive me for the absence.

it's been a ride e past few weeks.
mainly me gettin into sp.

if u guys are wonderin! yeaP, im lovin in~ pa da pap pap paP~
gyeaH!

im waxing my hair now..
even if i do got stuffs to blog abt , this sticky fingers are makin this
a lil tricky

hmm..what should i say now?

i can go school in anything i want~ hahaa!
sp rocks my holey socks la
any kachuack would agree with me la..

nuff said bout sp

mm..
dadio's gettin me the new sony walkman end of mnth
like...finally im gonna have a MP3 laaa woO!
no more singing to myself in the public ;)

yea...how's everyone been uh..
i always see sabbie''s post got msn script, but i never see her online?
trick..

leemel change his blog address sia hahahaha..alamak trick la..haha
wonder if he still reads mine, if u do! pls return me my mom's phone..thx=)

hmm..who else is like alien..

oh yea..charmainee , gonna call her soon.yeaP

hweehwee.how many pimples she has now hahaa

kkk..i lazy to think liaoz..
im off to sch..~

miss u guys like kidnapped teddy bear~

BreadTalk CEO's been caught for drivin under e influence of alcohol!
hahahaha

yea! ma ma ma baby!
yea! ma ma ma gerl~
yea ma ma ma baby~
u'll never rule e earth!

this aint a real worlD
it aint a f****in thiNG~

aikidoaidko!
peaCE oUT~*

2006-04-08T02:24:00.000+08:00

hi mak..

can i see u for a minute
lackin mommy; lacking me
tmr ppl gonna come
they're gonna talk abt how great u are
even more in my heart
the best there'll ever be
i can still feel ur heart

inside
inside
i feel like weepin all the time
ure the type tt could even move mountains
mindful with they ways
expert in your way
missing your ways

if i were to fall into a pit of darkness
i know u'll be there with the rope
the rope u found at the tallest mountain
the rope u'll find no matter what
the rope u'll get even if it kills u

and when u get me out
u'll scold
scold me like u've never scold anyone in your entire life
how i'd feel like the worst human on the planet
and how u'd still say u love us
and how's say all tt u so is for us
how you cry while saying tt
how you want us all to be together
how u said tt is enough to make you the happiest one ever lived

you are that and so many more
many more
it's been hundred days
the numbers they keep going
ur smell they keep coming
i keep thinking
they keep coming
im still takin this hard
im still takin this bad

stay with me
let me see you in my dreams
stay with me

remember~

2006-04-04T00:12:00.000+08:00

hey you guys.

thanks fer still readin this blog, even though it's like branded; procrastinating.

im not a really consistent person. in fact, not at all.
sad to say, but things i do usually are driven predominantly by my mood

but hey! im bloggin now~

paths.
tts what i wanna blog abt.

mm.i got work tmr n i have to be up by 0645
so im makin it brief.

path im in.
sp. business. totally wasnt what i wanted.
reason i got tt as a choice was cause mom wanted so much a family business.

mm.cant complain much..

next.
im back to baseball..or am i?
the thing is, it's been like 4 yrs since i last played. like intensively.
wholeheartedly kinda thing.

now im just too cynical. being e fact tt it takes 2 dollars plus n like an hour just to get there n back every training. and i can't pitch as well anymore. and im getting much too dark. my bro says so and kai hwee also. like..bad reaction from them. n i think so too. and it's on every saturday..i mean..jammin is so much better.
so im thinkin of quitting....again.

i've signed up fer the yamaha drum course.
can't wait fer it to start.
corrected by milton, who's gonna be in the course with me, the class is
startin may 06..not next week.. haha
excitement.like..euphoria.

siti mardhiah, couldnt get into the singapore youth flyin club cause
she was 2 cm shy the requisite height.
she'll be cursin me if she reads this.
anws. she told me i could still hold on to my dream of bein a pilot..
the turn off is..there's an awful lot of malay boys n there'll be an interview
and the training ground is like...at seletar..like far can.
but i dunno what to decide still esp thinkin of the sayin
if there's a WILL that's a way
i've always wanna be a pilot..but i feel so less motivated now..sheesh

yes..
paths..
which should i walk into..

think i'll walk right up to the bed now
after i tear the freakin cable car tickets! and throw it it away!
={

2006-04-03T10:10:00.000+08:00

i just woke up.

i had this dream. we were in a stadium, performing. it's a stadium gig.

then everything went so well, they wanted an encore.
aft that encore, i did a drum solo.
i remembered the drum kit havein a really huge cymbal.
like the first of its kind to ever be used.
and it was really a crowd pleaser.

then outtaf the sudden.
i was in a prison. but with my drum inside the cell with me.
and i was still playing..and playing..till i realised i've got a beard
which was already white and long enough for it to be entangled in the stick.
then it was really weird.
there were alot of reporters just at the other side of the bar
saying something like "you were too much, the kids went wild"
then there was this talkin head. talkin with the reporters.
and it was like defending me giving smart answers.
then i shouted like "ey, that head is smart!"
then it replied, "better than gettin myself in the tin can"

i was like, kena tricked. then it was over.

now what the hell was that?

2006-03-26T19:36:00.000+08:00

dont you all see, i can roar like a lion and jump like a flea?
talking is the game and please, only i can be the queen of lame
i can sing, no it's not a trick, i hear and play by the sound of music
end ur search if ure looking for a star, coz here u are, i am farah~

no i dun read lime or elle, coz im just me, im michelle
oh it's me, xue er is the name! and you oughta know u lame brain!
i wasnt careful with the milk, so off with the stare and that silly smirk
unless you wanna be but another, victim to my dearest brother~

look world,i've got something to show, it's the ever beautiful rainbow!
and look at me glow! see? told you im not emo~
i see you lookin at me funny, hey` enough with the bulky already!
but it's okay la, im cousins with gothika, that's why im alyssa~

im in my corner, drowned in fear and terror.
im sure someone's following, dun think im blind to your stalking
im slippin away from my mind again, sweatin faster than a crazy train
all that seclusion, was but a trip to asphyxiation
all that exile, was but a sanity trial
i need some place, a utopia, anything to escape this paranoia~

well these are some more poems requested..
yea.. =^7

2006-03-24T15:13:00.000+08:00

hey hi ppl..

this week's kinda rough..
u know those things that hurts deep inside one..

but oh well
i decided to make me feel better by being a poet that i am =)

just gimme a topic and u 'll get ur poem =P

here are some i worked out;

i feel cold i feel bare there's nothing else which compares...but im just lonely in a whole, for im but an asshole~

im a maid im a singer i live with a flinger, im really nobody compared to her~

twisting and dancing, hoping and wishing, oh cant u see babe my heart is sinking?~

i just wanna caress you, feel you, for you give me something like from up above, let's just make love~

naomi oh naomi, you are but a love wrecker, but oh god please drain all the pain away, all back to her~

i lost my keys, let the tigers free, i really dunno how to flirt coz im just an idiot~

there's no room for me to fit, there's just rotten meat, for they are intoxicated with fear, im a lonely tiger..~

sleek sharp and well define, oh cutey baby ure all mine. they know nothing , they must be handicapped, but oh boy in my heart is where you are kept~

the stars is what you're all about, those eyes they dazzle makes my heart shout. come and kiss me by the riverside, coz you are all i need to see through my plight. know that you are my cinderalla, my one and only joana~

make it split make it jello, i just love these fruits of yellow. make sure you carefully throw them skins away, coz it'll hard to brag for father's day...~

those are so far i've written for the ppl
want urs yet? =P

2006-03-14T13:24:00.000+08:00

remember watching shows with ppl trying to jump? suicide?

so yesterday right, i actually saw one, in real life. i mean. wow~

but it wasnt uh..v ultimate la, according to most suicidal cases.
he was only at the 8th floor.
and he would have jumped if he wanted to.
coz it took about 2 hrs plus before his attention seekin act got rounded up by the CDs
it was a pretty cool scene. they had this huge inflatable one the ground level.
i was sinfully wishing he's take the plunge. but oh well.

it's a sad thing actually.

i live in blk 133. this happened 13 march = 13 3
see?
freaky.

anws i wanna apologise to farah chewy elijah kaiwei coz i abruptly left
our conversation just to go see what happened
and barefooted at that haha.

wonder where is sabrina nvr see her online

this friday night till sunrise bodoh! lumberjack woo!

2006-03-12T11:31:00.000+08:00

so..
when i have a toilet of my own,
i wanna have plenty of sunlight beeming through the windows
it has a sub urban feel to it
there's a need for a bathtub

and in the walls
somewhere below the knee level
i'd install a very dim light
so when there's no more sunlight
it'll be but a feintly lit bathroom in the night...how sensuous~

2006-03-03T12:22:00.000+08:00

im here to write abt how ***ky today is

actually i didnt wanna post la
but im here already
and i have nth to do except for just scowling to "fuck the world" - the vines

it such a......................bitch
this feeling. haa i nv use that word de
oh well this is a smooth entry so it'll be smooth

im feeling like shit bcoz
im hungry
n im alone
n eli's posting was unsuccessful
and jamming's cancelled coz the eqpmnt is spoilt ( i broke the drum )
and dad's going overseas to work
and my aunt say im fat
and i didnt get into the freakin course
i got into some shitass business course
why god..im already not that smart..y wont u just gimme that course..
i only want that one..nvm tt im ugly n stuff
i just want that course..please
i telegraphted this anws..
i knew i woulndt be accepted
my last straw to humanity would be a rec letter from mr low
help me god
help me mom
mom it'll be a hundred days this 4th of april
it's so quick
sorry i disappoint u mom
i thought i'll be in aero myself
im a sorry person now
but gimme strength
i need to fight for the course upon appealing

help. ='(

2006-02-26T02:00:00.000+08:00

hi mom..

be seein ya soon.
hv been thinkin bout u.

take care mom. b..ye.

2006-02-21T21:54:00.000+08:00

each of us has got a diff background n diff styles.. diff ideas and diff tastes..
diff ways and diff personalities.. but we gotta stick together till the day we diE~~

coz it feels fuckin gd to be together like this....!!!! tt auntie thinks so too!

the nerves.

2006-02-21T17:41:00.000+08:00

one day on my way to school with my rusty(trusty) old bike
i terperanjat bcoz i spotted a flasher. unlucky me.
he was wearin a really thick nerd spects and was awaiting his "prey"

anws he was as good as nude that stupid son of a..trash(my eyes!! they burn!!)
much to his surprise of course
his first "prey" was a a diff species, a male. me.
like a disgustin slimy..thing
that abhorish humanoid squirmed before pulling up his pants
then fleeing off, makin a sickly exit with his lardy stomach quackin like an evil hypnosis

while all of these took place, there was a girl walkin towards
i was tied between warning the girl or chasing that stupid flasher
i tot since im with a bike im sure to catch em later, so i told the girl to take a diff route
but damn i let that disgusting toad got away....

damn u.....damn ...u..
i'll cut off ur dick!!

2006-02-21T17:13:00.000+08:00

what does this all mean........................................................
can u see sabrina there thereeeeeeeeeeeeeeee in between the 2 yellow shirts trick...

2006-02-21T16:58:00.000+08:00

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2006-02-19T12:40:00.000+08:00

yo!

yesterday was tiring la
it was the fundorama at acjc
eli n i cycled there, n we took the highway!(illegal)

damn crowded la,
but found sabbie's stall in the end
i ordered 2 ramly la, chicken n fish
i think fish nicer
she thought i was so so nice coz i keep buyin
but actually i was only hungry haaha
her cheeks were all reddish n stuff haha
oh no i think she's hot!

anws, it was raining
and so my shirt kena dirty water n sand haiz..
haha n was 'tompang'ing chewy
she thought it was v entertaining
her first bike adventure..haha so sad..woo!

that's that.

i was thinkin
we should really have our own space to jam.(the nerves)
like i told chewy i need 10 yrs to do that.
i need to learn how to mute the room.
$$$$$$$$ to buy sound eqmpts, mics amps etc
then drums..
then im sure we can write a hundred songs
n that everyone can express their ideas freely
rather then bein constricted by time limit
n everynight will be a heck of a night
ppl come come in for live performance at 5 lollar each
and those who wanna rent..well..dun think we should rent!
later abis all the eqmpts spoil la

yes. we need our own space.
then we can hone our skills there.
then we'll be tighter, like never before
so the next time if there's a recording it'll be so much easier
and hey we'll never get bored
or think of where to go if there's no where else to go

but dunno if my brudder will be for it
i think ..dad's gonna sell the house..altho i love the house so much..
maybe dad can help me out~
mom?...dun worry mom i wont forget my studies..!

so lee, will ,what say u?
what say u ppl?

2006-02-16T11:59:00.000+08:00

it's been awhile uh~

mm im makin this as short as possible
coz i wanna be cleaning my NEW OLD Bike! haa
it's my dad's boss' son's bike, the guy got too busy
and it is fortunately, in my possession now, woo!
the bike's abt 4 yrs old, and he hasnt been using it fer abt a year or so
so it's kinda rusty n dusty

anws this baby cupid's day was really something la
so at midnight( 14 feb, 00:00), i met up with shi chang
like any other bf, he was planning to " surpirse" his gf
plan: cycle to her home, lining lighter fluid into a heart shape and set it aflame.quite a spectacle.

n yknow he didnt have a bike so he had to borrow his friend's
but, the key to the locker broke! so chang HAD TO agree to get him a new locker,
after breakin the old one that is.
and it was mad.

here's the mad part,
we took an hour gnawing at that damn locker
i mean, we havent even started cycling and we already have sweaty necks.
with only my mom's garden cutter and some pliers chang "found" from some drawer nearby
we were quite desperate.
the locker was made up of 10, 5 52 strands of copper, pervertically intertwined!
i tell u, im not sure if getting caught, or the opening of the the elevator door every 10 mins (by itself) ,
or running away at every footsteps heard , was most scary. it was a weird...thing.

of course due to our strength ( mostly mine=P )
and chang's power of love, hahaa
we got it snapped! yayness.
and it wasnt easy.

k then when we reached pasir panjang( his gf's place)
we got "chased away".. sad la this part
she said her parents will kill her and bla bla bla
so then we cycled back home, chang's plan concluded in futility.
i would've wished his gf would just peek outtaf the window or sumtin like that
coz it was really disappointing!
we ended up playing the the lighter fluid by ourselves la..haha

n the best part was
reaching home at arnd 3 in the morning
i realised i forgot to bring my house key
everyone have only a few hours left before they wake up and leave me (haiz..) for work
so i really didnt wanna wake them up.
the moon was full n pretty that night
so i lie on the bench outside my house the size of half my body, just staring at it
nice..but body aching la ahh..
i was awoken by the TODAY newspaper guy ahah
it was quite embarressing..

then then the next episode of a disappointing story
was me cycling round holland with a box of roche,
just to cycle back home with it, hahaa.
gave my sister at last.
this pretty much sums up the week;
my ass is in pain, but all is in vain~

so what's new pussycat?

2006-02-07T00:52:00.000+08:00

kids these days ( like u and me ) are gettin more and more
accustomed to the world of cyber.

i assure u this is not a half past ten statement.
just look at yourself, readin on my blog. (im glad u did heee)
i mean, we really are like..condonning ourselves
to the habit of sittin in front of the com, just killing time.

of course utilisation of the pc has very broad aspects
and that it's the blueprint of the human advancement
and they really help ppl make big bucks
but that's beside the point.

im just underlining the underlying adverse effects it has on us~
don't u think...
we feel more confident and comfortable communicating with one another
thru msn?
don't u think...
friends u chat with online are so totally different from the way they talk in real life? like..where did all the lolx' go to?
don't u think...
saying out stuffs like 'dot dot dot' in a real life conversation is really a dumb way to fill up the momentary pauses?
don't u think...
i wouldn't have put all these words so nicely if im talkin in real life?
get the picture my dear cyber friends?

hmm..im not sure if i should condemn this fully
but to a certain level i do feel a tinge negative bout this trend
im not sayin this in a way im bitchin abt it
im just highlighting it
and would be amused to find out your cyber opinions!(who knws, u might not say the same thing to me face2face?)

i dunno..i think talkin face to face is fun!
i mean..u can make faces and they'll laugh ( if u have face like me that is )
and u dun have to type a really long clever joke ( like this one ) for them to just reply with a modest..."lol"
coz i know i really prefer hehehe and hahaha alot more!

im sure u guys catch the wave now~

2006-02-02T18:25:00.000+08:00

"that's not funny yknow?"

i mean...there couldnt be a much more indiscriminate way to show your dim-wittedness
than to start off with that line with ME. especially when u have me falsely accussed.
if there were to be a gd way to get me pissed, that would be it.

and i cant believe that came from a grown up. an adult. with a child mind you.

here's the deal, eli and i were walkin around, and i took lots of pic of stuff eg;sign boards, dome, trash bin, tress
and in the list of 'stuffs' i took didnt include ppl in it. which mean i didnt take pics of human beings.

so then were at this traffic light. i got bored waiting for the green man, so i decided
hey i might as well get a pic of us 2 since i havent snapped us.
so i held out the camera in front of us, with the camera facing us (duhhh)
out of the freakin blue, this adult couple with a child, came up to me and said that
stupid line ; "that's not funny yknow?"

how would u feel being posed with that qn, w/o any reason or rhyme?
so then i started with the most polite way i could, with a tinge of irritation on my face
"huh? what's not funny? i dun understand what u're talkin abt?" (not so polite aft all, it was a bad day..)

dim wit adult lady with daughter: "u think it's funny? u better delete that picture, do u know it's very rude?"
while sayin this, she looked really fucky.

dim wit adult lady's husband: "it's not funny, let me see the picture"
also while adding on to his wife's nonsensicality, he looked fuckly.

while givin the adult lady a phuckface "what pictures? what are u talkin abt? "

stupid lady : "that picture u took" (even a fuckier face by now)

with an even more irritated face "what pictures do u think i took? i didnt take pictures of you ppl! " (she really thought she was hot...i mean..liang po po is hotter..)

superstupid lady: "i didnt say u took pictures of us!" ( like what the fuck u say this for?)

i was up to my head. but then i tot, they;re too egoistic and dense to listen to me
so i showed them the gallery in my digicam.

while scrolling thru the pics " there, u see? no ppl, only things "

now at this point of time, a normal , sane adult being would seriously be embarressed and a little apologetic.
but NO. not this one.
he gave this WTF look and said, " oh i hope so "

then i widen my eyes and look em in the eye and said " no no, it IS so "
and then i didnt wanna look at them.

so..who's the funny one now?
even funnier part is that this all happened in front of the supreme court
....
anws, besides that
the point is adults like them should be banished from the face of earth
they are like so....disgusting
it's so easy to abhore them, to loathe them
i feel so sorry for the daughter.

then on the way home i got so really pissed
eli was telling me to forget bout it like 4 times
they totally ruined my day

and today..
i went to bukit merah library to settle the fines
then i was told only cashcard and ezlink may be used to pay the fines
....
i have no cashcard. n my ez link is spoilt.
so i went to the library just to come home.
...why..

oh mom
if u were still here
u would show that face and start cursing them stupid idoits
then i'll feel so much better havin someone to share

then
u'd show me that pathetic face
and say nvm to me today for makin the wasted trip

hope ure readin this mom

2006-01-28T11:58:00.000+08:00

hoi hoi hoi

gong xi fa cai

hong bao na na na na na na na na na na laaaai~~

ok.i wanted to celebrate cny.really.
coz both hari raya, n hari raya haji sucked
then again im not so...
ah...what's it called that word...

just recently my eldest bro wanted me to join him
for this dragon boat thing
every sat, at 3 pm
n i wasnt thinkin far i just said, yea sure
now im not so sure if i wanna burn my sat aftn ridin sampan with a dragon head
i gave em my particualrs anws..im like registered.
ergh

and then i got this sms from a friend
askin me to join this marathon kinda thing
dunno what saf thing
then got prize money
and stuff...yknow
sun sweat and all that jazz
then he like..wants a yes or a no fer me today
and im still undecided la

i just have this really huge lazy bone.
im not sure where
but it's in me fer sure.

anws im really x 11
bored.
bein at home alone is kinda cool sometimes.
but then when it happens more than often
then u'll go a lil gaga
and do embarrasing stuffs like..
~ eh tmr u fundorama thing right ~
~not that's like next next next week ~
im so....................funny.
ha.anws.sorrie i called fer nth sabbie. erg

next saturday recording.
make it gd.

2006-01-25T12:37:00.000+08:00

the numbness, the effigie-lookalike, ergo..The Nerves

it's sometimes best just to be natural=)...although i risk looking a bit like a gerly guy..

2006-01-23T15:29:00.000+08:00

mum im sick
i want u to wet the towel and put it on my forehead like u always do

mum i got flu and fever
my nose v itchy my throat v dry
mom u use to come by to my bed when everyone else is asleep, just to check me
and u'd be puttin ur hand on my forehead and then off u go to the kitchen to get me
a glass of water..
that's u mom..the greatest woman in my life

and i know u said guys shouldnt cry too much
but i really really really miss u mom

it was vivvy's birthday party yesterday
elijah was suppose to go with me
and he said he feels sick so he wanted to stay home intead
i mean, i was already feeling unwell myself but it's the poor girl's birthday party
and she like invited us elijah..
anws, as if that didnt suck enuff
i forgot to bring vivvy's present along with me............trademark me.
luckily matt agreed to accompany me to the party
so i thought he'd bring the present for me
then it turned out , he cant find my present..
haa...

anyways, the party was fun
there were alot of small people ( kids )
and there was this little boy so cutee
i carried him first then all the girls wanted a piece of him ( of course he sticks to me )
then everyone was like askin his name and stuff
tried asking in both chinese and english
but little do they know it's a japanse boy...haha

and we played near the pool and stuff
of course i got wet
and got even sicker
coz there were like air con
ice cream and stuff

then when i got home i got really sick
then i wondered if i shouldve just did what elijah did
it's much more cleverer
i mean now im sick and i feel so...like...miserable
haiz

anws, we ( the nerves ) are lookin forward to this friday
our song is finally gonna be recorded
it's called Butterfly, it's a lil sophomore compared to out other songs
cant wait~

and hey, eli got the third place booked for us mansssss
tmr it is, 530pm
be there or be squaree!

...panadol please

2006-01-18T14:00:00.000+08:00

i really wanted to blog , but then..i think i forgot what i wanted to blog..

im really forgetful..
right mom? yea..

for instance, now that the ez link can no more have bus concession..(damn)
i have to tap in twice, one for entry and the other's for exit, and that, is much too perplexing for
my brain to understand. coz i forgot to tap when i alight.

then, this morning awoken by my sis' call, i was to heat up the chicken soup and
put in some carrots and stuff.. i told myself i'll heat it up before taking a shower
so i ignited the fire, went to the shower. (love shower)
so then i left the bathroom, and the soup heating...

there are so many incidents to show my carelessness and forgetfullness and whateverness la..
but i just...forgot what they were.
ok.

mak!!............................................mak
uve been visiting my dream quite often mumsy=)))
woo!!

2006-01-08T19:41:00.000+08:00

just one more time...just one more..

just tell me to sit up straight
just call me to ask me what time im comin home..
just tell me to take out the trash
just tell me im careless
just scold me for nothing..
just tickle me even if i hate it when u do that
just cook me my fav kentang bijik sawi
just tell me to take the clothes in coz it's raining.
just tell me to go pray..
just take my hard earned salary..it's for u
just tell me to water the plants..
just tell me which movie u wanna watch..we'll go together
just sit and watch wrestling with me
just sit and listen to me play
just tell me to hurry up when im singing in the bathroom
just ask me if ur shoes and pants match..even if it's no use coz they always match
just tell me where it hurts on the feet and i'll massage it for u
just wait for me on your chair for me to come home..
just tell me u've had a really bad day, so i can be the clown
just know what im feeling now, dadsy's worse by a hundred
just....scold me
just smile at me
just sing to me
just...be in my dreams..

we're all even together now
even ur siblings, like how u always wanted it to be
didnt know u had to pay the price, someone had to, right mom?

im so pround of you
be, of me.
i wil always love u.
u have no idea how much i miss you

2005-12-31T17:19:00.000+08:00

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh
I love you
Oh oh oh, oh oh oh
I love you
I do, I do
But I told you why we just can't make it
I want you still but just can't take it
The time has come we oughta break it
Someone has to pay the price
Oh oh oh, oh oh oh
It's over
Oh oh oh, oh oh oh
It's true, it's true
And I think of times we were together
As time went on it seemed forever
But times have changed
Now things are better
Someone had to pay the price.

2005-12-24T04:15:00.000+08:00

heya

it's 4 16am now.
and everyone's asleep , so it's nice and quiet.

i had my nails cut and toes cleaned
coz i had to go mosque on friday.
i put alarm on my phone.
mosque starts at 1pm
guess what time i woke up?...4pm

haiz...

when i woke up, mumsy was cookin.
then will wanted to chill. i needed air.
so i told mom im going out soon.
then she was like... uh~ i thought u'll be home for the day~ if i'd knew i would have
gone to aunt's~..
that's the second haiz..
sorry mumsy.

then i had to meet the guys late
coz i wanted to appease her a lil
so i waited for her cookin to finish
eat and go
yah.i was late...haiz...3rd

it was already close to 6pm when we meet at town.
my mind keep thinkin...uh shit..work soon...!!
so i didnt really had the mood to really hangout after all
this is the fourth haiz..

so then
work.
lee and i head to my house first before going to work.
our journey there was me just listening to lee talkin to..on the phone
and i felt a little...
if that wasnt enough, at work
eli and lee talked abt....again. and again.
everytime they start is everytime i stop.
maybe im just too selfish to bother buttin in to their conversation
im gettin anti social..
and it was all at work, irritation plus labour work makes my face really..
so that's the 5th haiz..

so duh..aft work we didnt sit to talk
i wanted to get home asap
and i'll just bore everyone to death with my silence
on the way home visited the kitty's grave...sixth haiz.. =((

then.......=)))
mumsy was still awake=)
when i got home
she heated the buns for me, coz she knew i havent had dinner
then she also made hot milo for me
and we watched wrestling together=))))
then i felt so loveddd
then all those haiz'ness in my just poof*
then it was so funny..i was like...oh mak~ here comes the best part~
then when i turned, i saw her sleeping..hehehhehe
cute.

then ya.
i felt so dumb makin the long face all day.
all i needed was some attention and..yknow.

o ya! i saw sab online before going to work haa!
i was suppose to be smiling aft tt
but then i thought of work n stuff..-.-

haha
woOo~
oH oh oh~
oh Oh oh~

i loVe you~

luvya mumsy~ hee

2005-12-22T18:48:00.000+08:00

the room is dark. the hall is dark. the toilet is dark. the whole house is dark.
but it's nice.
bcoz it's raining outside.
though it's subsided, there's still just raindrops pitter pattering, it calms me.
and it's cooling, the weather that is. but it's dark.
it feels so romantic. but im alone.
i can only hug my legs.

the only light are the ones outside my house.
the light seeping in through the blinds on my window.
it accentuates the romantic feel even more.
i have to find something else to hug.
for a second there i felt like going to sleep
sleep on my mother's king size bed.
but then again.
why sleep away this time.
it's so...did i say romantic?

where is everyone?

leemel said he'll come over.
i think he's cheating my feelings again.
im like so used to it.

the floor outside as i peeked from the window, is shiny and looks as though
it's lacquared.
but the very image dissapate as a raindrop sends ripple through the floor's surface.
as i returned to my seat, i realised it's only on rainy days that my house will save on electricty.
ppl will just go to sleep without the fan switched on.
and it's really one of the times the blankets are fully utilised.
and it feel so nice just to bury yourself under the blankets.

i keep turning back to see if anyone is staring at me.
then i remembered, oh..i am alone at home.

2005-12-22T16:05:00.000+08:00

there wasnt anything else on mind as soon as i saw tt..lifeless kitten.

the most painful part of burrying it was, to close its little eyes..
coz its eyes were open when it breathe its last breath.
it's really..sad.

i sincerely hope ppl will take the trouble to show empathy to animals.

with tt off my chest.let's fill in on what's up.
it's..well.
yesterday we went jamming again.
and we had eli and chewy for audience.
it was..=))

i still have no idea why lee said it was a waste.

like the past few weeks,
works been the biggest toll on me.
and the last few days was really something for lee eli and i.
they were aware of the consequences of pangse'ing
so they were kind enough to accompany my lazy bones till early morning
just to wait for the bus service to start.
im sorry.. i think i wont be lazy again ok, i will walk frm now on..

of course there were so many things we talked abt
and i just cant keep myself from sighing...haiz.
kenneth is going to canada to study..i was like wth..

everyone was just really sad.

wish lee would forget bout his ex
wish eli would have been the drummer for xmas at his church

sigh..

wish we can have more songs.
wish william will go sp.
wish chewy wont be so sad coz her bro is in ns..
there were sumore i wished for..i freakin forgot..

anws
i've been sleeping at 7am and wakin up at 3..
i feel so....wasteddddddddddddddddddddd
like so long nv go msn looooo
and i just found out sabbie just went online right..damn
wish i can save herrr
y u so down..

i think im dumb i think im dumb i think im dumb

2005-12-19T14:38:00.000+08:00

so the past week's been really hectic right..
i mean..it's work from 1030pm to 1am
then later work at 1030am to about 8 pm
well then u got to work at 1030 pm again..
n walkin home from ikea everynight's becoming a
ritual for me
occasional cat sightings..
pretty pretty moon accompanied by the twinkling stars
i wish i had a damn cam..!!

it's like so tired can..
but im happy that today im treatin mom, sis, and bro
to watch king kong, with my hard earned money=))
im so proud of myself hee..

so then, i have this letter from the ns right
im to confirm whether i wanna defer or just get on right to it
my mo says wait n discuss with my bro and dad..the seasoned ns men haha..
i dunno if u shld just go or put it on hold
hmm..

oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
jammin was like.........................warggh!Hh!!!H!Hh111!!!!! 1iuoi!U!OI!U!!!
it was like..the best session we had.
serious.
fullstop.

shit.
i think im unfair.
i didnt ask my dad along.
shit.
no more money left.
and i booked for 4 only.
shit.

unless i give dadsy my ticket..

2005-12-13T15:36:00.000+08:00

im very pissed now.
so i intentionally put BARNEY AND FRIENDS - I LOVE YOU
on the the repeat on the playlist.
i love u..u love me..we're a happy family~ with a great big hug and a kiss from me to you~ muacks~
and..i think it helps a bit. although the song is like 1 minute and 3 secs long.
reminds me of the really happy days when i was younger n coming home to watch cartoons
was a really happy thing to do. it was all...happy.

anws.
one of the reason why im pissed is coz elijah's on the verge of getting fired.
like wtf. wtfffffffffffffff!!
i really really think it's fcuking stupid.
i mean, he's only been to work for the 2nd time.
and i really think it's all thanks to that fatso uncle badmouthing elijah.
there was nth coming out from his mouth but just really mean words to elijah.
i was really gonna blow up if he went overbaord.
everytime time he opens his stinkin mouth to make noise i stopped my work
and gave him that fcuked up look
he was lucky he stopped everytime i did that
if not i'll burst his heavy sack he calls tummy.
wtfffff
and all we do is closing in
the work at the end of the day at 10 30 pm
when there's no customers, not untill next day at 10 am
so what's wrong with doing work less hastily
coz in the end he still got the job done
and the so called 'boss' even had the cheek to even think of
firing him when he's shorthanded....!!!
and he didn had the guts to tell elijah in the face
wtffffffffffffff
elijah, i feel sorry for u.
i know my face didnt show that i was sorry for u,it's bcoz i was more angry than sad.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(love u too barney...)

we didnt even jam..
i pissed william off
im sorry man, i wast clear..haiz.

it's all so sad and angry.
but the song is just playin...
and playing..
it sounds so..lovely..

and leonard took off on wednesday to go out with me
but i had urgent call up and had work on that day..
like wtff
lucky his dad berfdae is on that day so his off day wont be such a waste..
but still sorry man..

im still pissed..and angry n sad.
and the song just doesnt suit.
argh.

sorry elijah.
sorry will.
sorry leonard.

i need to go out.......

2005-12-09T19:15:00.000+08:00

i will explode any moment now.
it's so boring.
there's nth else to do here.

101 101
10101 10 10101
110101010 1010 10101010
10101010101 00010101 1010100101
011010010101001001011001010010101110101001
101010010101010101010101010100101010101011
010101010010101010101010101010101001010101
01010010101010100101010101010100101010100101010110011
1010 010101010101010101010101010101010100101011 0101010
101010100101010101010101010101010101010010
0101010010101010100010101010101010101010101010101010101010
0101 0101010101010101010101010101010101010101010 010101
1010101001010101001010101010101010101010101
010101001010101010101010101001010101010101001010101010101
0101 010101010101010010101010101010010101 010101
010101010100101010101010010101
010101010101010101010101010
1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1
010101010101001010101010101010101
010101010101010010101010101010101010010
01010101010100101010101010101010101010
01010101010101010101010101010101010101
01010101010101010101010101010101010101 10100101010
01010101010101010100101010101010101010 010101010010
0101010101010101010101010101010100101 01010101101011
01101010100101010101010101010101010 01010100110
01010101010101010101010100101010101 01010101
010101001101010101010101001101010101 0101010
0101010101010101010101010101010101010010101010
0101010101010101010101010101010101010

now..tell me.
how bored i am.
where the heck is sabbie.

2005-12-08T01:00:00.000+08:00

i tried this qn thingy to see what gender is my brain
n this is what i get:

Your Brain is 60.00% Female, 40.00% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female

You are both sensitive and savvy

Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed

But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

so. i am abit aqua. ahh..

and i feel inferior lookin at ppl with sharp nose
and they always look better
n i think i know why my pics are always spoilt..no sharp noses.

sharp nose like..
elijah
jonathan
mateen
rajpal
milton
syuaib
willian

sharp nose..

2005-12-07T22:26:00.000+08:00

ok. i just wish that there was only one religion in this life.
i mean. there isnt a lack of discrimination and prejudice against a certain religion since the beginning of history.
countless of senseless killings and loss of life.
headlines after headlines, it just wont stop.
they should just change their point of view..and stop.

or..
is there a reason for the array of religion.
might it be a test, a divine challenge, from up above, for us humans to undertake?
to see if we can all clear our double vision and see that there should be one love
to see if we can all just..get along in spite of the hundreds n hundreds of religions.
hmm.

we should all be religious when we can.
coz in religion can we actually feed our soul.
and it opens up the mind and heart.
and in it, when u listen carefully,
it is always advised to make good relationship with ppl from other religions.

sometimes,i ponder on what the freethinkers are feeling when
they have no one to turn to.
are they feeling empty?
i mean.there will always be love to set them at peace
but at the end of the road. yknow. death.
what do they think? do they think it'll end just like that?
i belive in heaven and hell.
and that all deeds will be accounted for and rewarded justly.
never will i disregard these ppl at any level based on this(freethinkers)
but i really just wonder what they feel inside
i hope they will be at peace with themselves
when they start askin qns like..the purpose of life and so on and so forth

all religion teaches good.
so is there much difference at all?
enough with whether it is right or wrong..hell i love the drums they play in the indian temple.
and the fact tt muslims cant eat pork only shows how much ppl take the effort to serve us halal food. and that's cool.
and damn do i miss the eight immortal show on channel 8, i mean sun wu kong is so cool can.
and without christmas holidays, will there be as much presents?
and talking abt holiday, we have chinese new year, deepavali , hari raya and what not~
i just love the multi colored life la..

but sometimes i think
which religion we are in totally depends on what families we are born into
like, malay so muslim, chinese so buddhist/taoist etc...
coz we know ultimately, all the religion teaches good.

so................
why cant we all just get along?
could it be so difficult to put up a smile and join hand in hand
and just make the world a better place

it's just so much better to have cohesion in diversity
we can just set the differences aside , cast away the reservations
and just yknow...gel. just gel. be one.

those who've read this.
please, please, always make peace whenever you can
coz we are all god's creation.
and coz war sucks.
( i suddenly remembered the saying , "without war there's no peace", and im cracking my brain up thinkin why there's such a saying...is it like they will be satisfied and finally realise that war is nth but just bloodshed and that they will not do it again coz they will know tt it's really really bad only after they've started it..is it?)

one love.

2005-12-05T20:30:00.000+08:00

unfairness.sadness.queerness.

here's the deal.
lee and i were like rounding plaza sing
and there were like...i counted...abt 11 la.
it is noticeable lo. they not only dress up "very man", they act intimate with their..(i cant say counterpart) ditto-part? ya..the world's going strange by the minute can.

we were at the arcade la.
then there was this girl we're checkin out.
i mean..ya..ok..kinda hot la. but ayE! check her ouT! like really check it out!!
she has her hands tuck into another umm..'guy's' bak pockeT!!!
tt's like so er sing lo..
and she was like very near us la
and she kinda like smiled at me(the female, the real female one)
then im not sure how to react..
it's so weird. like..uber weird.

aww man..
is this the doing of man?
like..maybe those umm..butches, was in fact, in a relationship, and tt their bf
treated them real bad. and then they thought to themselves tt, if i was a guy, i would never
treat a girl tt way. and so explains the transmogrification in the gender.
we all know how heartless man can be...

maybe..
or maybe this theory is nowhere near logical.
haiya.
still. sadness.
i always thought boys and girls go good together....right??

2005-12-03T00:30:00.000+08:00

is i read sabrina blog de.
then hor got this random quiz thing lo.
like write sumtin u dunno one uh.
so i write lo.

the quiz also is like now i PASANG
then i must catch 5 other ppl to write the same thing abt they all the self
the 5 ppl i want to catch one is:
-matt
-will
-lee
-eli
-yunnie
u all must write hor
coz i catch u all oleady ha! so sad=P
must write really one eh dun anyhowly say la
esp william. ok tts all la i think
so my one is like this

5 random facts abt muhammad syakirin bin ghani

- when i was smaller, i was so into wrestling i told my mom tt i wanna be a wrestler when i grow up. she freaked. n now i understand why...

- i like that particular smell when it rains.n the sound of it. and just sometimes sit and stare at it. and get lost into it. like...the falling of rain...brings life to the plants..the leaves will then grow..and caterpillar will feed on it..then finally be a butterfly..then helps plant to breed..hehe..the butterfly effects of rain? hmm,,

- i always fantasise abt me n my gf rollerbladin while holding hands, when the sun is setting.

- i have no idea why i am not into malay girls. not tt im racist(not sure if tt makes sense) or what,
but no offense. i just favour chinese girls somehow. i dont know why. in fact, i've been liking
chinese girls up to date. n i also have more chinese friends haha..

- i love being alone. but hate being alone. another thing i hate is ppl playing with my head. ya..i'll punch u in the nose..

now im pretty curious to know if ur perception of me remains unchanged
albeit my honesty in completing the 5 random facts abt the very me tt might
forever be unknown if not for sabbie's initiation in such eccentric blogging antics..

2005-12-01T16:40:00.000+08:00

mmhmm.

im suddenly so into erm..i guess u call it the 90's music eh? ya
not like into it like a big hoohaa la..like..a sudden liking.
stuffs like..check this out eiffel 65 - Blue (Daa Bee Dee) i like this one
ironically, considering the fact that i abhore the monotonous techno genre.
this, on the contrary has lyrics and bridge and catchy chorus. im for the idea of
doing a cover of this even, like.. a rock rendition of it.
then..ace of base - i saw the sign and all that she wants
and my all month fav would be fool's garden - Lemon Tree
yes, i can already see the eyebrows raised.
mm..now im already thinkin of that song, get down~ get down~ and move it all around~ i think..it's backstreet boys or something..
i just cant think of a logical explanation behind my abrupt liking of these old songs..maybe it's the umm..gd ol memories perhaps..yea.

and HAVENT EVEYRBODY KNOW YETTtt im SO bOREDdddddddddddddddddddd!!!!

......
im like. there's no one else at home. called elijah to come but he like dun want come like that. sianzation cannn.
feel like i wanna smack somebody.
go around n bitch slap somebody.

anws.
i think in life, these are all there is to it.i think.
- career
- passion / dream
- religion
- marriage
- family
- friends
- intangible aspects like..dignity/etiquettes/happiness/love
ya. uh huh..tell me if i miss anything.

what else...umm

looking for a job i am.
it's so mundaneeeeeeeeeeeeee so slowwwwwwwwww so anemic
it's like im suferring from permanent sianified syndrome
like totally under inertia
like...totallY~

what else ..haaaaaaaaaaa.haiz

2005-11-28T13:45:00.000+08:00

dead.

2005-11-26T23:10:00.000+08:00

$10 = to amara hotel + ride home......not exactly-.-

the ride there was $7.50 man..the traffic was like..and the frustration was like..
and the ride home was past midnight ma, 4 idiots (including me) thought 2 dollars each
was enough to accomodate all fairs from there to bukit purmei to depot road to queenstown to redhill. and since i was last in the ride, i had to stop short. the meter like was extra fast like rolling every cm it seems.. i had to walk from commonwealth mcdonald.. i even had bangla askin me where the prison was..-.-"

oh well. the prom night was cool. sch said no halal food but then they catered for us anyways haha..

aiya it was nice la.
she looked gd, he look gd, they look gd hell even i looked gd, so said ppl..

then ya, the only cons bout it is that the dance floor was open at the last part of the whole thing
and they dj played the music for only bout..15 mins
i didnt break a sweat. a gd thing i guess..-.- ... no! not a gd thing
it was so fun just to push ur way into the group of girls dancing and they'll like just
like woOO~~ and they start dancing with u
it was all good..

and rajpal and i was like takin on the dance floor
showin our move yknow, kinda like a lame 2nd rate dance battle
but it was all funnn

yea.. and yay i was mr model please
cant u all tell yet
i look like hugo boss' model laaaa
teeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

yappp
pictures aft pictures, flashes aft flashes
hugs after hugs, numbers aft numbers
off we go den.

n tt was prom nite.
{=

2005-11-23T11:18:00.000+08:00

haaaaiyaaakkkk. it's finally over mister. and we're all off the hook. yayness please.

how was it syaQ?
well... im not really sure what to make of it..
i mean..ure not suppose to have like half hour idle time doing and O paper..
not that i used the time to oogle on private candidates la.. but hor..aiya i dunno.
i checked at least thrice.
n do u see the irony of completing amaths paper w/o using at least 5 papers..
it's like..the sec 4 exp student beside was like..whoa..so many crushed up papers.
then i was like, am i just writing crap again?
and i never like..have been able to breeze through amaths..!
and when my friends asked how the paper was, i just switch to my
normal stupid lame me, sayin, it's the same, it's nice and white and it has lots of words.

im not sure if i should rejoice or sit down under a banana tree and embrace myself
for the worst. oh damn. it's scary all over again.

one thing's fer sure though. it's overrrrrrrrrrrr
like how i shut them all up when they cant agree on the answers
"kids~ it's overrrrrr"
ha...

following up to the last paper,(tuesday) was a steambot treat at marina.
$10 per head, and all u can eat spree. it was...okay la.. i like the crab.
and the chicken soup i improvised is nice =)

and today(wednesday) im gonna have to pick a really really nice top for the prom.
im going for rockstar. wanted cowboy..but it'll cost moree...=( oh well~

and the next day,(thursday) amir masoh will be checkin LumberjaCK out.
it's been ages since we jam. im afraid we'll be rusty. like..i still can remember the
factors of fall of venice..complacency of venetians, overdependance on mercenaries. ok. shh.

then(friday) it'll be the big day. prom night. sure i'll dance. >=)

a lil busy a week.
wonder what i'll do next week.

wonder if there's a need to list out stuffs to do.
wonder if we can write enough songs.
wonder if i can get that cheque back soon enough. damn.
wonder if have enough to buy lee a present.
wonder if sabbie will go out with me. haha.
wonder what james blunt was feelin when he was writing ur beautiful.
wonder if i should go get a job again.
wonder if i can find kirara again. kiraraaa...
wonder if i did well for Os...

n i wonder i wonder i wonder how i wonder why
yesterday u told me bout the blueblue sky n all that i can see
just another.......

mm.

2005-11-18T23:29:00.000+08:00

well it's like..
okay la..

but then..yknow..
maybe it not so much of it that..yea..

but then when i come to think of it..
it's a lil...uh huh..that's right.

so then when u really wanted to..
just go ahead with it..
full force? full throttle? full hit? full stop.

so..what now?
u sold urself.
u expose urself.
u hear the piano playin and u force urself to cry.
u hear thoughts in your head and u act them out.
u see skies up above but dun know where's the limit.

so sad i am. so nice u are.like wat sun is after the storm.
like what warmth is to cold. so true. yet so cruel. the simplicity of laws of nature.
opposites attract.
opposites attract.
opposites attract.
o p p o s i t e s a t t r a c t
like a plus to a minus
like a fly to a bright light
like a baby to lollipop
like a girl to a diamond
like police to a thief
like u to my blog..maybe not.

so..fries anyone? chilli please...

2005-11-18T00:31:00.000+08:00

today's post was brought to u by the letter E.

word of the day ; End.

the letter "E".. its origins dates back to the early 11th century
when alexis II the great dicovered the remains of "creature"
according to the nobles who served under his reign, he compiled
his findings in something moderners refer to as "scrapbook".
and in one of his many scribbles, he desribes his encounter with the
remains of that "creature". it was concluded in his account that, it was
but the remains of a demon. the most outstanding features of the demon
is that it had 3 horns that protrudes from its head ; |_|_|
it was nothing alexis II the great had ever seen.
he included in his findings, that there was an eerieness and a morbid aura
that gripped him, and specifically stated that there were whispers in his ears.
it was something incomprehensible for him. but he wanted to ink this nightmarish sensation down.
so then the word "E" was born. he wanted to write something down that would be most accurate to describe that disturbing sound that he heard. and the 3 horns was deemed most fit
by him. the reason it was rotated from |_|_| to E was because, the former was used to represent castles, and the latter was thus established. and it is pronounced as 'eeeeeee' because
that was how those eerie "whispering" sounded.
so, that was how the letter 'E' came about.

..i can't believe u read this. it's all crap.

french fries?? no?

2005-10-25T17:48:00.000+08:00

last night at the mosque i was observing a guy
this guy, was a tv personnel a long time ago. he was in the "Gurmit's World" shows..a famous comedic variety show back in the 90's by Gurmit Singh. i dun think many could recognise him.. but i remembered and i know him.

boy..he was emotional. like really emotional.. u know tt kind of cryin where ur face will be distorted in funny contortion till u can feel ur cheek buryin ur eyes tt kinda cry. then that sniff. then as he does this he tried to swallow and hold back his tears. it was uneasy watching him.

so then i started to ponder.
and ponder.
and many kinds of hypothesis yielded.
i wanna respect this guy so i wont share my thoughts %-)
the reason i came to that conclusion is because..
when he was done grieving in silence, he looked up and try to fix a smile. at tt instant i know now even clearly, what a broken smile is. i think he put his mask back on.
unknown to him of course, the past few minutes with his mask off was me watchin him.
and if u ask me it was more of a sad thing for me to see that instant transmorgriphication than it is scary.

he's a small man for his age.
he's got wrinkles aplenty, probaby from frequent breakdowns...
he's partially bald, and a little on the frail side. if u were less mild u'd say he's scrawny.
and he wears ordinary polo shirt and gentleman pants.
u cant tell from the way he carries himself tt he can actually look forlorn....a very good mask he has.

so.........................yea. i dunno why i wrote this.
maybe a point of self reflection would be...
ppl sometimes wears masks. and humans are strong and weak at the same time.
and when u think ure sad and depressed. there are others too who are crying harder and in solitude.
all u have to do , is remember tt there are people who are watchin on you and tt u can be happy if u open up to them. yeap yeap. (speakin like a no rate psychologist again..)

world peace~*

2005-10-17T09:58:00.000+08:00

alright i signed in right. the plan was to blog right...
here's the thing..i feel like blogging.. but i think i shouldnt be blogging..
i should be memorising stuffs like.. paper 1 format... or get in my head which element is insoluble n bla bla..

n then i get sidetracked again. yesterday was...i dunno what was yesterday.
the gig's cancelled, thanks RITA, tell KATRINA i said hi~
it was raining like...........
but it was kinda nice a weather la..yknow..it was blowing cold wind, in ur in ur sweater n jacket, then u'll feel
comfortable warmth of it... i knw im contradicting myself la.
but it was ultra awesome la..
we were held up backstage..yknow esplanade dressing room? the mirror with 25 watts lightbulb around its
perimeter tt kinda thing..man..it had its own tolokt and it was nice la..we felt like rockstars CAN.
it's the same place the PETER PAN's cast were using. ~ do you believe in faries ~ *snap*

oh ya, e gig cancelled right. so then we just sat there in the rockstar room la.
jennifer, once a top 10 model in s'pore, also the organiser for the whole thing had a lil chat with us.
she's cool uh..down to earth sporean.u shld check out her photo, she's hot....20 yrs ago.
anyways. she has this friend of hers..Amil, who's interested in The Nerves, and wanted a demo from us.
which instantly reminded me of our first demo...Scrapp...it was so sad..our first song. and we for sure dun wanna have tt included in our new demo. i think we'll have 3 songs in our demo eh guys? Lumberjack, Mr Blue Ant, My Heroin. baaaaaaaaaaikkkkkkkkkk.
we we're talkin to jennifer till lee and i forgot it was time to break fast.
so then, the closest outlet tt had consumable stuff was...the toilet. yes uh.
we break fast with toilet water. the toilet nice uh. haa...
so The Nerves' victory flag wasnt that drenched tt night. it sorta like lead us to a new path. and guess wat, we still get paid for not performing tt night. sweeeeeeet popcoooooooorn.

then reality starts sinking in la.....pushing me down..to muddy waters..stuck..immobolised...stupifyyyyy
it's the Os la syaq....wake up la..walan. i wrote bout 3 paragraphs by now and im still high at the thought of doing the demo. somebody shoot me la.. but i hate chem la. aiz....

n yea. this was what i wanted to write abt.
I AM SORRY. for those who came...i am thankful...but im sorry u came..it sounds stupid doesnt it..
im thankful n sorry u came la.. ok. im sorry. even kai hwee came my god.. it was very chun uh e momo's father was going to india. yea.. and yunnie sorry. prem sorry. xue er, myra n her sister. affendi..will's friend..those who called to say u cant make it, it was totally cool. did i say im sorry?... k...

do u guys know that Michelle Wie , that chic playing golf in all the big tournament is 16? and that she's hot. oh me oh my...

Os.
uh Oh.
Os.
yea,.
cmon cmon.
guys sorry.
k
Os.
yea.

2005-10-09T01:02:00.000+08:00

cant sleep
coz i think i need to get it off me la..

it's important to do what u think is right..
it may sound liberating , and sometimes a notch up at that, but..
when the chance slips, when u know u should have done it..
ure in regrets and dissappoinment start seeping in..

then, my friend, u should now know, what's right and what's wrong.

it's amazing how, sub consciously, under the influence of a foreign substance
which seemed to be of adverse effect to you, would just
spit out everything that u've been holding back, everything that u've been keeping inside, everything and anything tt u didnt want ppl to know..had been made known to ppl..
scary uh?

fret not coz...it was fortunate to have ur best friends around untill ure
...sane again.
it was not one of best memories to have, but at that moment, u were vulnerable
and everything that you did and said, somehow made an even closer bond with the ppl u treasure most. and for that, it was a bitter sweet story.

just knw tt when u think there's no one, there's ur frends.
and when there's nth to do, there's sch.
and when there's nth to look forward to, just look at "lumberjack" B-)
and i knw tt person means alot to you,but if 2 ppl were meant to be,they will alright?

"everybody sleep tonight
tmr we're gonna be alright
i got my best fren beside me
i got another infront of me
everybody sleep tonight
tmr we're gonna be alright"

i didnt mean to sound gay, really
but hey! ure the one who hugged me once too many~...remember %-)

so there.
think i can sleep now.
16th!!!!!

2005-09-05T16:37:00.000+08:00

Nirikays stood, rooted to the ground, staring at an all new drum kit.
the best in town, TAMA. Old green, with a tinge of yellow. just the way he like it.
"maybe i'll paste some cat stickers on it.." thought Nirikays to himself, already
musing at the thought of havin tt brilliant showcase in his room.

from outside the music shop, he could see many boys sittin on stools
playin acoustic guitar, lookin all cool and soulful.
"probably tryin hard to serenade the jc gerls there.. " thought Nirikays.
on sundays, there were guitar classes. most of the students were
girs from the nearby junior colleges. Yes, they were eye candy, very alluring, to an extent
tt dropping by the shop have a totally different meaning.

*gulp* time suddenly ceased. Nirikays found himself in a trance, it was like somebody pressing
the MUTE button then everything went into a silent blur. His attention was fixated at this someone.
" shit!... " Nirikays cursed his watch as it beeped into a careless frenzy, interrupting his sensuos gaze.
lunchtime was over, and he had to report back to work.
he never turned back and look at a shop so many times before as he dragged himself to work.
he wasnt sure if it's bcoz of tt awesome drumkit, or that awesome gerl..

Nirikays was workin his ass off, hopin to god he could sum up enough to pay back what he'd lost.
It was the same damn carelessness again. Not once, not twice....but thrice.
It was the same old deficient trait of his tt has led him down into a spiral of guilt and self-reproaching.
A month after loosing his wallet at the gig, his mom bought him a brand new wallet,which could also be known as, just another wallet in line to fall victim thanks to his carelessness.
it was a long bus ride to the jammin studio and Nirikays got too comfortable in his seat. eventually, his wallet slipped off his back pocket. It all happened the same way, it was almost disgusting.

Many weeks past. And many working days past. He earned $1111.
Through many visits to the shop, to make sure tt drumkit was still in stock, Nirikays learned tt, tt gerl he saw the last time, had a bf.
and he also learned tt they werent a happy couple. He could sense a break up anytime soon.
he wasnt sure why he felt good abt it, it was almost pervertic. but he wasnt even sure what to do abt his feelings for tt gerl. he was already in a limp keeping a wallet. it was a longshot to even be friends with her. at this juncture of his life, he settled at the idea of bein more reserved. he figured he is not worthy to befriend with. he'd rather spend time working for cash, or write down lines of " i lost my wallet thrice " during his free time. he hated himself. he felt less guilty and somehow fair to keep to himself exiled from the common teenage life. common teenage life was something alien to Nirikays, but he knew they don't lose their wallet thrice.

Debts settled. Financial burden lifted. and all he had left was $11.
As if his life didnt sound pathetic enough, his very rare desires went up into smoke;

" see u in my dreams then.. " said Nirikays to himself as he lay his eyes on the drumkit for one last time. he knew it will be sold off soon, and he couldnt get it.

he walked a spiritless walk heading home.
" not even tt gerl.. " he said, reminiscing tt moment of forever..

the end.
didnt' know y i wrote this.
so dun ask.

2005-09-01T13:01:00.000+08:00

greetings blog dwellers. ni hao ma? chi le ma? harap - harap baik aja~ nandri~
ahhh..Racial Harmony=)) don't u guys just love the racial cohesion in our country.
if u ask me, S'pore is where it is at now, thanks to racial harmony. =))

aaanyways. there was once a boy. named Nirikays. he was really careless. really.
he lost his first wallet when he was in primary 3. tt wallet had alot of 5-cents coins and 10-cents
coins which he'd collected around his neighbourhood. At this tender age, he already felt a pang of loss and guilt for loosing his wallet. He vaguely recall to have the wallet slipped off from his back pocket while he clung onto the monkey bar, hanging upside down into his favourite "bat-beast" position. He vowed to not be a bat-beast the next time he played...

half a decade had passed when he finally got a new wallet. Albeit his bad experience carrying a wallet, he was sure he could be more responsible this time. besides, he found it hard to be bat-beast after 5 years without practise. he was 13 now, and thought tt he looked grown up with a black leather wallet. Pierre Cardin.

Few years'd past. Pierre Cardin was still the wallet he called his own.
At the night of march 19 2005, Nirikays and his band got to perform at a party.
Everything went well, and they shared a moment tt was unforgettable.
Unfogettable indeed, tt was the day Nirikays.....lost his wallet. He was then again guilt-stricken, but at a greater degree this time. He hated himself for bein so careless twice. He'll never be the same.

part 1 of 2.
to be continued..

2005-08-28T20:12:00.000+08:00

"disengage people. let loose.
let ur hair down. do the loosey goosey."

a phrase. quoted from the man himself.
Adolf Hitler.

his nephew actually.
Zelpher.
he was a pimp.
a saddistic, twisted, woman - beater.
a psychopath , drunk with power.
his every waking hours meant throwing his weight around,
soliciting women, gallivanting at pubs, cursing peasents at sight,
distributing drugs to kids he calls "candies", abuse women after
losing his money (not tt he runs out it) gambling.

Zelpher was, however, nothing like the incorrigible bastard he had morphed into when he was young.
He was an accident. Parentless. A bastard in a sense.
Brought up by guardians, Bertzoix and Selheiz the real parents entrusted to.
Little did they know, their son was used as a threshold for the insane Bertzoix and Selheiz
to vent their anger on. He had sleepless nights crying, positioning his body in
awkward contortions, making sure his bruises do not stain the bed sheets. Perhaps the cats at the streets has got more mercy than Bertzoix and Selheiz.
Zelpher already looked scrawny as a toddler. God knows how many days he'd withstand with only dog food and drainage waste. It's a wonder how he survived.
He never talks. Never play like other kids. He was alienated. He was dead.

As he sat one night, hoping to god ( an existence he imagined, who wont abuse him, something or someone that is non-Bertzoix, non-Selheiz) that his misfortunes will magically disappear, a man in
tight-fitting brown suit came in with a long revolver shooting both his guardians. Everything happened at a blink of an eye, Zelpher's thoughts was scrambled by the 2 gunshots. His eyes was fixated at the striking right arm band of that man. Zelpher's dry lips cracked as he smile.

The legacy,the world had learned and feared, was of his uncle's
thanks and the doings of his undying perverse passion for bloodshed and misery. He feeds on cower, submission
and plea. A satan, in human form, adorned with fiendish facial features.
Glassy eyes. Pointed ears. Disgusting growth above his demonic lips people call moustache.
Zelpher indulged on his uncle's reputation. He parades around town, gloryfying his uncle's
heyday and whatnot. Poor Zelpher was deluded and intoxicated with so much hatred and
dark past that he lost his soul. He pledged alliance with the most inhumane formation known to
history, and was viewed by society as a parasite with authority bigger than his head.

Now imagine. If you could turn back time.
What if Zelpher was not brought by the wicked guardians.
What if he was brought up, sheltered, showered with love and care by his parents.
What if he was allowed to mix and mingle like kids should do.

would he be the same senseless Zelpher you have read about?

This is in fact, all crap.
nth abt this story is real. well maybe except for hitler.
his name came into mind ferst coz the tv showed his face.
what im doing is exaggerating the importance of having someone to
care for you. be it from parents, friends or pets! and etc.

cmon..would loosey goosey be even something they've heard before?=P

2005-08-10T08:59:00.000+08:00

umm..

er...

yknow that kinda feeling when u thought u really have lots to say, but......yknow.
suddenly yer thoughts are robbed. you're not sure by what, or how.
but u suddenly switch to stoning.
then u try very hard to keep on track, what the hell was i trying to say??
you know that feeling? do you?

yknow how sometimes, u feel bored with what u have.
but inside u, u know u have to be grateful for what's around you?
how sometimes u feel u were suppose to be doing something else
but ure all cooped up and strapped down with the everyday routine?
how u feel like running away into some other place and know that there are
greater calling for you, then how suddenly u snap back to reality, laughing at yourself
thinkin how dumb u were?

yknow how sometimes when u get sick, u think to yourself; if i was really
sick, like terminally ill, who will be around u at your hospital bed?
how sometimes u imagine what you'll be like when u grow old, will u remember
all your friends, will u have the love of your life alongside with you?
how sometimes u make up your own hypothesis as to what happens to
you when u die?

yknow how sometimes u wonder how your parents manage to stay together,
how they brought u up, the hardship they face trying to give u a comfortable life,
while at the same time being filal son/daughter-in-law and responsible brothers
and sisters?

and...how sometimes u wonder why did u bother typing all these out??

2005-07-24T19:40:00.000+08:00

and so it ends.

lost wallet.

common test, c'mon.

sabbie's sad.

pay ic, money, none from s o r.

vivvy. thank you.

devian silent as a rock.

still am forgetful.

that took nine seconds.
wanna fight?
bye.

Scrapp

2005-07-10T10:53:00.000+08:00

gimme sumtin better than a poison
gimme sumtin better than a gun
meet the lady who planted all the poison
she likes all the odds for the king to solve

yeah yeah yeah yea~
yeah yeah yeah yea

cut my hair like u did to my grandpa
cut my lips just to greet with a lipless smile
she just wanna be heard to be seen by her grandpa
she just wanna kill wanna steal with her son

yeah yeah yeah yea~
yeah yeah yeah yea~
yeah yeah yeah yea~
yeah yeah yea yea Ooh~

she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal
she just wanna kill she just wanna steal

2005-06-28T10:49:00.000+08:00

well yknow..at least one and one makes 2
but what if one is 2!??? what if??

well at least we see ourselves.even if my name's...
well at least we found the building...

well at least we got the raksasa's attention..

well at least we ate chicken rice..

well at least leemel slept at gotham city.
well at least will got static to blame.
well at least i get one day to ponteng
well at least i can still reminisce the adrenaline rush..

well at least this is still at post..

well well well ~

2005-06-16T11:28:00.000+08:00

i have some glue.

i have debts undue.

lesson learnt
point of no return.
poly or jc
or work cleaning urn.

what the hell is that?
ade ah..

hey! guess what?
off the island, im gonna be.
destinasi? Cameron Highlands
might just be one of them tea harvesters,
yknow all the old chics pickin stuffs from the fields
i think i should ask fer their number
u want?gegege

hmm..wonder who'll miss me.

speakin of which.
the other time, alex, jinbo n i crashed the airport to study overnight.
of course..only i ended up studyin. ;)
aaanyways.joel n i reached terminal 1 earlier.
to see his gal off.but joel was cynical all the way, he didnt think
he was gonna wave his juliet gdbye, or ever gonna have her love again
when she comes back. yknow..feelings change and all.
i, like a half-senile partially retarded love doctor, told em to be strong and all.
and in me,somehow, i felt so much wanting him to see his gal fer one last time before she leaves.

eventually, after half hour of waitin and playin overn over again
"right here waiting" with my phone, he did got to see her.
and the next day, she even called him.
perfect.
perfect.perfect.

yea..

dunno why i wanted to write tt out.
it's so not matching with the whole concept of this blog.
oh well~

cameron, here i come then.
oh, accounts n chem txtbk are also taggin.
happiness.

peace.out.

2005-06-15T10:24:00.000+08:00

heya..

it really has been anemic these few weeks.
hmmm
mmm..
mm..
sorry was eating fried rice in front of the comp
and just told my nephew to get me another bowl.

aaanyways..
really glad abt the postponement, i thought
fer sure we're gonna have our chance squandered.
there's a cat on the window...!!
ahaa..
put away a dead cat yesterdaay;(
yea..drivers pleaseeee take note,
cats are famous fer their curiousity,
mjhgy( mashed by my cheeky nephew)
funny, if i were him i'd mess up the whole blog.

erm.often times we're lazy, but do we do anything abt it?
well..yea. =))
i did.

this song: Jack Johnson - Flake
guys..good song.

yknow how it rains outside and you're still in your
sleepwear ( if there's such word) and it feels so nice
and cooling and u only wanna go back to sleep
but ure suppose to bathe now. ahaa..
wake up slow..

it's shichang's berfdae today.
i tihnk i'll buy em a present sumhow, hmm..

today jamm. the nerves. \m/
yea..

will got his new amp.
lee's got his bass.
syaq, where's yer drum? ade ah...

sabbie momo.indivi. nice name.

working capital + fxed assets = owner's equity
ok? ok..

no more fried rice liaoz. darn it.

oh well.
im not sure what i have been writin..ahh..
i must be so sad and bored.
but no what..
what are you doing?

2005-06-08T18:22:00.000+08:00

heeeeey waaaaaaaaittttt i got a new complaint!!!

forever in debt to yer priceless advice..

syaQ: hello blog. what's cookin?
blog: hello my good man. no, nth much.
syaQ: everything ok?
blog: well...i feel empty.
syaQ: oh sorry..i've been busy.i still love you, really.
blog: yea?..=))
syaQ: *nods*
blog: write me baby!!

*to be continued*

it's nice typin out words without any restrictions right?
like say.....asdo;ip93up9qjdom;9usa;udosujp9u3
aup9d3aupd9upadj
sa9cmpaoiudp9up3a9urp93upa9fjoadsjfafafsaf;ijsafp9up9ajp[93dj
yea, sumtin like that. i love this thing.
haaa....

it's great to head down the beach sumtimes,
hell i even fell asleep on the lagoon at pahlawan this morning.

anyways.
happy berfdae kakyan, nor, syasya, khobeer.
i need 2 more presents fer the june babies.
i might face bankruptcy.

im a timed bomb
that'll burst anytime
go away
hear it ticking?
tick...!

haaargh.

high and dry... .. .. .. .. ... ...

2005-05-21T13:02:00.000+08:00

mid year exams;
at the rate im passing, it's as good as falling all of the subjects.
so much fer wantin to burn all the books after mid year...
*trash all kerosene cans...*

yes.i did not really study.
nor was i planning to.

it's those kinda things when u decide to see where u stand
w/o any self enrichment or tutorials..in this case, studying.

so hey..i see where i am now.
and...it's something that i cant be proud of actually....eek..

and that's all there is to it. yes...the teachers are all over me.
i wont start on my parents.

that aside, i have other more prospective topics to talk about.
will, lee and i have entered in a band competition, organised by a
local press holdings. we're gonna kick some arse~
hopefully get some scouters who are interested in our band...
that'll be very very very very very..neat.

and..im also gonna play in a street soccer tourney.
hopefully i'll bring some glory to the sch.

aunt's really sick.
she has this abdominal cancer.mom's really worried bout her.
it's dampening to see these kinda things happen..haiz..
i might just make her kill me if i tell her my result..-.-"
im so dead.and dead.and...dead.

im working.data entrier, i am.
yknow..need cash and all.
my form teacher was so so so so ultra kind to have paid fer me my
O level fees. so, im workin fer the repayin also.
and to enroll myself in a drum class.hopefully.
or get myself a drumset.hahaha....ahhh..

but im kinda yknow..feelin guilty to spend on anything on myself....yet.
im not a gd kid/student lately..
people will go..see..played to much soccer and guitar..all yer grades slide~
hergh..

so.im high on the downside.
and dry on the highside.

so much fer mid year.
there ya go.
peace~

mid year tribulation.

2005-05-08T01:48:00.000+08:00

it's been quite awhile since i last do this thing.
i tried as much to recall and record what i have been doing or not, into this post,
but current state of mind; capacitated with mounting information
laced with constant anxiety of screwing up midyear, has yet again
proved that, bad memory is a trait of mine.

as of now, i still have 7 papers left to remind me what im doing(NOW)
is not what i should do. what i should do - mugging.
but i've been a nocturnal creature with an obsene relationship with
textbooks and scrap papers as of late.
so...guilt level is considerably low. fer now that is.

im blank right now.
1:59 am
a minute to 2 am...duh.

..devian is at all time discreet these days.
roz must be studyin.
lee must be thinkin about his bass-to-be.
will....don't worry.u'll get in.
vivvy, just msged gnight.
mom..im so glad u like that teddy =)
the other souls that i've had contacts with..well..
see ya soon maybe.

im feelin a lil enveloped in this solitary night.
here's something...

WHEN THE LIGHTS ARE OUT

it's been
too long
too cold since im, sittin by the wishin well~

it comes
it goes
it stays untill, you see it in yer dreams n well~

hollow skin
haunted soul
im still searchin but, im livin in a lieeE~

well it's okAY~
i won't delay~
turn the lights out
im tired anyway~

don't let it stay
just run away
coz when the light're out
im tired anyway~

no time
put it down
nevermind i still, have a little life n well~

i close my eyes
i see yer face
u were smilin but, only fer awhile n well~

i called yer name
it's just a shame
i hear beetls crawl, and nothing but my voicEee~

you come
you go
you stay untill, i see you in ma dreams n well~

hollow skin
haunted soul
im still searchin but, im livin in a lieeE~

it's been
too long
too cold since you, left me by the wishin well~

-syaQ

meow~

2005-04-20T18:54:00.000+08:00

im so proud.
i buried the poor cat.

like i'd guessed, no one did nithing bout the poor cat.
it was 4 plus.just done "studying" in the library.
cant really do much in there, i felt feverish.im sick thanks..
n it's like i have soccer interhouse tmr...wtf.

niways, talkin bout shortcomings, we(aloy, xiong, moo) didnt
had anything to 'save' the cat. we stared at each other fer a bit,
then i told them iwas serious bout doin sumtin to the cat see..
their bus came..n it passed. i smiled. so then, operation cat rescue commenced
;)
i looked around.yea, plenty of earth.plastic bag?..conveniently
tied on to a branch nearby.god knows how it got there.
hands to dig? i decided that to be the final resort.
so umm, i took out a "soyabean" can outtaf the trash, split it into 2
and voila~ i got us a digger.

dig dig dig. dig dig dig.xiong and moo were using the feet to sweep
the sand into a mount fer me to scoop and fill the bag.
aloy was like standing there..."help me lerh!"
and he was like.. "use what??"
im like..grrr " use your face can? push it with yer nose..arse.."

anyways. we got the job done.
im proud.
but sick.
k...
love catss guys.
peacE.

2005-04-19T16:23:00.000+08:00

yea.....................~
it was unbeeelieveable man..well, only fer about 5 mins.
but it was sumtin i'll never erase or trade fer nithing else.ever.
well done joNny boy, NerrIne, and Dzaki.
with such short time fer practise, i think u guys were great.

felt the lil chill in the kness fer a bit.but it was all
pUre adrenaline rush at the chorus, well..melodiously(i hope)
hah~

standing ovation. <---check that out.
you'll never get plenty of that in one lifetime.
im just proud i got one already.*devilish smirk*

god.i saw a dead cat on the way to sch.my stomach turned.
the next day, i saw the same dead cat, only more decomposed.
im like.god. ergh.
if it's stil there on the 3rd day.immona go do sumtin bout it.

let's go SCRAP. let's go Mr Blue Ants.
we got plenty right guys..
i was thinkin. Nyca's Project.

..i want a cat.meoW.

.

..

.
meoW~
peace.

2005-04-14T18:05:00.000+08:00

uh huh.while everyone's done with thier syf performance.
it's my turn tmr.hehheh.feels like im so gonna screw.
like suddenly losing my voice at the centre stage.
that'll be a scene.........heh~

hmm..i want a cat.
a shorthair british tabby.
dun think there's anything like those here in S'pore.
whatever.just want a cat.

alright~~~
2 days to The Nirvs Jammin Day~
heh..

erm..
wish me luck.
peAce.

2005-03-26T11:46:00.000+08:00

*clenching fist*
this is fer sure one of werst matches i ever had.
who would've thought a nice friday aft could turn out to
be football riot?

so there i was last few minutes of second half,
in the opposing penalty area, the ball bounced and
hit the defenders arm, which of course is a handball.
so i appealed fer penalty. the referee/coach of the team
'suddenly' got blind and didnt blow the whistle.
alright fine, was what i said.

as if i wasnt annoyed and pissed enuff,
this numbskull came up to me with his fuckface face and
said in malay, 'ey why dun u show the ref a cam?'
like fuel to fire, i exploded inside. but i kept calm fer a
moment.no...he had to vomit sumore sarcasm and got my nerve
tingling. so there. i got myself into a childish dispute.
few seconds into the argument, this older guy motioned like a duckling towards me pointing like a toddler at my direction, and said
in fiendish malay, 'ey, u got a prob with my bro??'
now, i know he was comin to pick a fight, i can see it from his gorrila drawn face. i know i shouldnt be the one to start the fight.
so i waited fer him to make the ferst move. as soon as he laid his filthy hands on my chest in hopes to push me off balance(right..)hell broke loose and the dispute turned into assault.
those mofo got me 3 to 1. i managed to punch one right in the face and wrestle one to the ground, but hell the got me from the back with their boots as well...gays..

and that airhead referee only stopped the match when
i got hit. that imbasel and disgrace to referees worldwide.
so the guys held me back. and eventually the fight ended..of course
no thanks to the referee. god..as SabbIE would say it sounds like a tv show.

then ya..cut short the story. got me, and the 3 faggots
in the interrogation room. now this is the bizarre part of the whole day. these 3 nymphoid totally change their face, all smilin all lookin like wha? what happened? i tell you, even goofy looked smarter~ so, they are actually 2 faced snakes existing in human form.
and dunno fer what fuck, the police story out about his days as a football coach. and i stood there, ridiculed. what? it's story telling time now? hello!! i got beaten up you fatass!
man.............
oh..ya, this is the best part. he stared at me and said, it takes two hands to clap [ahh!!!! so wisEeeeE!!! someone give him a noble priZE!]
n i feel as though..whoa..i dunno what i felt really.
and the highlight of the whole show was that, we shook hands.and the POLICEMAN said they regreted what they did. so now they've got a speaker..they all turned silent. a total contrast to their unintelligent babbling of vulgars and whatnot at the field..very gay.

yea.good friday became a bad friday.
my back...man..
aight aight. this sucks.
out~

twist of fatE~

2005-03-22T17:25:00.000+08:00

man..what a rush.what a rush...!!
19 march, the day the nerves got its ferst
performance. it was kickarse guys, i think
we made our ferst impression a gd one~
amazing hw far we've come only as a baby band..f**king
terrific.luv u mel, luv u will, nvm how gay that sounds.
we're just awesome.

heh..but hey, prior to that it was already havoc ya..
we're sweatin our ass off at the dance floor..the people we're like
so freakin dead right till' we showed some of our moves.
duh!!..we started the danCe frenZy!!
oh yea..we had this soul train and, in front of me was a hot caucasian babe. man..she was like, "oh my goD~" commenting on how
silly it was to 'soul train' at her age~
i was like, "like i know right~" then she just tagged along hah.
her hair smells nice niwayz. hah~

yea..then ma peepz came!
it was such'a great place to have yer crazy frenz arounD~
aft our show, we just left the stage.oh yea, we left coz we're kinda pissed off..we did only 3 numbers. we're to do at least 5 songs..
that canniving lame dickhead. such an ass..such an ass..
reason behind our shortcoming was that there weren't nuff time,but know what? HE, HIMSELf, dickhead, shouted fer encore fer the next band..the screaming gayofied band. i was like..wtf??

f that. niways. we got out. and hey~ Charm n Devian are chillin outsiDe~ so lee will and i hung around at the black leather sofa where there were..and made a fool outtaf ourselves ..as usual.
this was the part i enjoyed most bout the whole day..apart from our show of course. maybe coz i missed that Charm, or maybe i just needed to destress so much that ultra lame jokes seemed to fit the bill to make my day. whatever it was, i was kinda glad devian , pun, Charm, and my band was there. it was..krezee~~

yah..i thought i'd took plenty of pics with them, when my cam went dead at just the precise timing. joy.
luckily managed to have one with both devian n charm in one of the pics. =D so sorry matt..u werent in any of the pics taken.

erm...so then. Charm had to leave fer home early. sent her to the station to see her off , with pun. n on the way there..it was so funny..there's this guy friend of hers. tall, specty, nerd sounding.i was like crackin joke throughout, but only he didnt laugh..n pun and charm was like, damn.u're so dumb. charm was like, oh nvm u moron. hmm..kinda petty that guy. maybe the joke wasnt really v funny in the ferst place? hmm...

so far so good. so, we left the party.
lookin fer some place to eat. hah..oh yea, halfway, lee got a gal's number. Sarah. that's a souvenier for em..heh..gluck man.
where else but gd ol Changkees. heh..
got an empty stoneage and settled down while chowin down on the hot goodies. =D
then, pun n devian left. yes. so fast.

walked around hmv afterwards.got tired then headed fer home.
elijah n barak were with us then.
throughout the whole crazy i was pretty sure i didnt have my wallet with me. kinda sure i left it at home.
so i borrowed fare money from eli.
home.
then followed by a lil surpirse reception at home.
pizza-thon. there were boxes of em. i devoured 6.
niways..right up till then, the whole day seem so surreal.
so happy.so gay.almost lost my voice.

win some lose some? well i certainly did.
it turns out my wallet werent at home either.
i got totally frantic.period.
but it was already like past 12mid when i found that out.
i got too tired, i decided to look fer it the next day.
no sir.nowhere to be found.IC, EZ link, POSB card, heart shaped paper. all..poofed away from me.
the wallet..had it since 9. man...hysteria i tell u...
i got so pissed with myself..
i still am...ergh.

was such a crazy roller coaster of emotions.
one time i was the happiest 17 yr old, then
just down, wallowing in the shower. just great.

so there..that explain the twist of fate.
but fact remains, that'd be one of my most remembered day.
the birth of THE NERVES.
the abduction of my precious wallet...

kinkyNUTS!!
...out~

lackeffect..

2005-03-18T10:48:00.000+08:00

performance comin up like less than an hour's time.
excited?..yea
y the face?..those whom i really wanted to see at the party will not be there..lack-effect.

hmm..amazing how u know lotsa crazy people'll be there to watch u, yet u dun feel AS excited or anxious as havin "special" frenz to be there~ ..sappy.

yes i know, others'll be there fer the support, devian, matt, amir. thanks guys~

not sure if we've much to give actually..we're still a baby band and barely 2 months old~ but..as kurt would say..F*** it~
it's the passion of playin rather than perfection.philosofizer~

back to nirvana.
ouT~

career crisis

2005-03-10T16:04:00.000+08:00

is so much importance placed on a piece of paper?

it is if it's the O's cert, right?
well..some'll say, wait till u are to sit fer yer A's~
and that is if u make it to JC..close to unreachable.
man..
and it's still anarchy durin chem class...god save us..~

touched on matters of exams upon typin this ferst post,
so i'll be less guilty knowin at least i worry?...hah..that's so...tacky~

still wonderin why i even bothered to have another blog...
mmm..well..beats havin lil events in life slip away thanks to stale memory..
then while enticing readers with my funny words im compiling these things as well..heh~

well, so much fer the resurrection.
ouT~